mirror of
https://github.com/Xevion/the-office.git
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2287 lines
90 KiB
XML
Vendored
2287 lines
90 KiB
XML
Vendored
<SceneList>
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<Scene>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>[on Youtube video] There is nothing wrong, nor will there ever be wrong with any Sabre printers. Case closed. [phone rings, Michael picks it up] Michael Scott, as seen on TV.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">michael</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>[high-pitched voice] I saw you on the news and I want to pinch your tiny wiener... [normal voice] It's Packer!</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Todd Packer</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">todd-packer</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>OH! Pack Man, I thought you were a girl!</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">michael</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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</Scene>
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<Scene>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Apparently, there are allegations that Sabre printers can cause a fire. So they asked me to give a statement to the press. I'm like, what? All right. So I do it. It's on TV last night. And it's in the paper today. And it's online. And then I call Froggy 98.7, the request line. I talk to the host about it on the air. It's like, come on, people, enough.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">michael</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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</Scene>
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<Scene>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Everybody, we are at DEFCON 5. I am officially the second-most watched clip of the day on the WBRE news site.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">michael</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>What's number one?</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Oscar</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">oscar</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Oh, that teacher who was wrongfully accused of being a pedophile. Now, we cannot let the pedophile win again! I would like you all to go to the website and watch my clip eleven times.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">michael</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>So instead of working, you want...</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jim</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">jim</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Yes.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">michael</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Okay.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jim</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">jim</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Yes. Come on! Get it up! That's what... let's do it!</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">michael</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Oh, did you see this report that the zoo got a baby otter? It's on the same site!</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Angela</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">angela</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Awww, it's kissing its mommy!</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Phyllis</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">phyllis</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Please.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">michael</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Michael, you have to see, this is like, the cutest thing ever.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Dwight</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">dwight</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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</Scene>
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<Scene>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Really? A baby otter? Okay, um, count me in as who cares. It's not even that interesting a baby otter, it can't even stand up. [looks toward computer] It's trying to stand up... [choking up] there it goes.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">michael</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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</Scene>
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<Scene>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Howdy. I hope I'm not interrupting anything.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">jo</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Jo! We were not expecting you!</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">michael</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>'Course you all, no doubt, know why I'm here.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">jo</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>No.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Kevin</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">kevin</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Turns out our printers are famous. They're all over the news. It's an interesting story. Cheap foreign printers attacking innocent Americans. Well, actually the, the real story isn't quite as racy, but uh... let's give it a go.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">jo</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Jo, I think that I know what happened.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Kevin</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">kevin</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>I'm not sure you do, teddy bear.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">jo</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Well, now I think I might not.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Kevin</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">kevin</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Not long ago, we discovered a defect in one of our printers, so we got a software patch and fixed it right up, just like that. I don't know how it works. But just as we were about to send out a letter to our affected customers, giving 'em free toner, and we keep 'em, happy, but somebody here, they liked that first story better. The one where we lose half our clients for no damn good reason! Whoever it was who talked to the press, they should come forward, please.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">jo</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Jo, Jo, I can assure you it was no one in this office.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">michael</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Can you now?</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">jo</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Absolutely. Anyone who talked to the press, please raise your hand.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">michael</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>[quietly, to Andy] Put your hand up, Norma Rae.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Phyllis</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">phyllis</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>If you say anything, so help me God, I'll break off the temples of your glasses and stick them in your eye sockets.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Andy</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">andy</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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</Scene>
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<Scene>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>So unfair. Even if I thought that our printers killed baby seals, I would not be a whistleblower. The Bernards, for generations, have silenced whistleblowers. It's how we made all our money. Woody Guthrie wrote a song about us. [sings] Old Mr. Bernard, old Mr. Bernard, who have you silenced today?</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Andy</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">andy</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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</Scene>
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<Scene>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>[as Gabe hands out forms to everyone] It's a little form, says "I did not do it."</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">jo</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>There is no reason for anyone here to sign this, because I know everything there is to know about these people. I know when their birthdays are, I know what their favorite kind of cake is, I know what color streamers they like...</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">michael</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>All that's just birthday information, Michael.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">jo</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Yes, yes, but it shows a bigger picture.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">michael</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Why don't you come with me? We'll start out with the honcho, what'cha say?</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">jo</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Okay.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">michael</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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</Scene>
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<Scene>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>When Mama was working as a prison guard and something went missing, she'd ask one question:</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">jo</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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</Scene>
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<Scene>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>So say we catch this whistleblower, what do you think I should do with him?</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">jo</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>We should give him a one-way ticket to Montego Bay, where they keep all the al-Qaeda.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">michael</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Uh, that's, uh, Guantanamo Bay.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">jo</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Yes. You put them in jail for a long time, you put them in jail for as long as you can.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">michael</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Well, I guess we're all right, Michael.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">jo</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>I want these people to really pay, I want them to suffer. I'd prefer it if they died, 'cause it's not right.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">michael</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Yeah.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">jo</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Okay.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">michael</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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</Scene>
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<Scene>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Hey Dwight.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Nick</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="recurring">nick</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Hey, IT guy.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Dwight</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">dwight</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Mind if I get in there for a second?</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Nick</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="recurring">nick</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Oh, sure thing, go ahead.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Dwight</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">dwight</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Just one... [Dwight pushes Nick's neck to the desk and pushes his arm up] Gah! Ah! Dwight, what the hell?</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Nick</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="recurring">nick</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Apache persuasion hold, that's the hell! What are you doing to my computer?</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Dwight</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">dwight</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>The lawyers are searching our hard drives for information on the leak. Thanks a lot, Big Brother.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Oscar</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">oscar</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>You're with Big Brother? Okay, go ahead. I got nothing to hide.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Dwight</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">dwight</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Wait, are they searching all our computers?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Kevin</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">kevin</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Yeah. [Kevin runs to his desk] I already got to yours, Kevin. [Kevin runs back]</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Nick</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="recurring">nick</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>No, that's cool. Sometimes... sometimes I run. I'm a runner.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Kevin</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">kevin</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Everybody knows it was Andy, and it is not fair for us all to take the fall for his big stupid mouth!</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Angela</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">angela</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Ridiculous, Angela. And like I'm going to believe one of his spermed lovers.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Look, he's been complaining about this for a while, it's not crazy.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Phyllis</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">phyllis</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Okay Dwight.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Hold that thought. I don't want to waste your time, and I wouldn't dare waste mine. I didn't do it. Now, I don't know exactly who did it, but I have a list right here... [hands Jo a piece of paper] You should fire the following people.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Dwight</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">dwight</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Well, I'm inclined to believe you.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Why would I disparage a company that has made me rich beyond my wildest dreams?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Dwight</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">dwight</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Yeah, I noticed you've had a great year. Good boy... you turning that money into more money?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Are you referring to alchemy?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Dwight</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">dwight</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I don't like to tell a man what to do with his money, but if you ain't investing in property, then you're dumber than a dummy.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I'm not dumb. I'm smart.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Dwight</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">dwight</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Well, buy property. That's my advice.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Is there something that you would like to say to me?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Uh...</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Andy</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">andy</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>About talking to the press?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I, I didn't know. I didn't do that!</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Andy</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">andy</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Mmhmm.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Okay? I, I... didn't do it.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Andy</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">andy</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I don't believe you.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I swear on the graves of my parents who aren't even dead yet.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Andy</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">andy</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>That's a little much. All right, all right, all right.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I don't care, that's how much I swear!</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Andy</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">andy</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Okay, I believe you, I believe you.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I don't know who's giving Darryl any crap. He was more bothered about it than me.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Andy</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">andy</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Did you tell anyone outside of this office that the printers were catching on fire?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Yeah, I did. I, I was talking to this girl at a bar.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Darryl</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">darryl</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Oh, no, no, no...</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I think she could... sense my sadness, and I, and I found out too late that she... she's the copy editor at the Trib.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Darryl</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">darryl</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Oh my god. Was she cute?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>No.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Darryl</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">darryl</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Oh, god, Darryl!</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I basically swore up and down that none of my employees did it, and then I find out that one of my best ones did. And now he's probably going to get fired for it. And if that is not poetic justice, I don't know what is.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Sounds like you were as blindsided by this as I was.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Well, that's...</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Toby</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">toby</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>And we didn't find anything on your computer.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Good.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Toby</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">toby</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Except this. [hands stack of paper to Toby]</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Oh, wow, this is, uh, just a mystery novel that I've been working on.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Toby</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">toby</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I know what it is. I skimmed the first chapter. I'm just curious, why would a man who hates people want to have a relationship with a maid?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Oh, uh, I don't know, uh...</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Toby</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">toby</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>The way I look at it, there's only one of two reasons. He knows a secret about her that she doesn't know herself, or he wants to use her services to mop up after a murder.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Oh... yes.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Toby</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">toby</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Write your own damn novel.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Toby</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">toby</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>It was me.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Pam</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">pam</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>What was you? You were the leak?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jim</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jim</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Okay. I'm talking to this woman at daycare...</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Pam</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">pam</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Uh-huh.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jim</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jim</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>She's telling me about all her amazing trip to Vietnam, I have nothing. I tell her our printers catch on fire, spontaneously!</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Pam</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">pam</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Why'd you do that?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jim</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jim</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Her husband's a reporter.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Pam</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">pam</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Yeah.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jim</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jim</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>So now everyone hates Andy, and it's this whole mess, and I don't know what to do.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Pam</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">pam</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Okay, just relax. Just need to relax.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jim</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jim</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I could tell Jo... or I could tell Michael.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Pam</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">pam</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>This is a very good idea. This is good. Let's get all the bad ideas out now. Flush them out.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jim</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jim</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>You leaked it?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I don't know what to do! Do I go tell Jo, or - I don't want everyone to keep blaming the wrong person!</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Pam</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">pam</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I don't know what the best plan is, Pam. Oh god... my mind is going a mile an hour.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>That fast?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Pam</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">pam</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Oh.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Two whistleblowers... two! I always thought Darryl and Pam might get me fired for something I said.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>[Michael knocks on Pam's desk] Yeah? [Michael points at Pam, himself, and Meredith, mimes drinking, driving, then points to his watch and holds up five fingers] I weirdly know exactly what you're saying to me.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Pam</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">pam</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>So see you in Meredith's van in five minutes.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Yeah, you didn't need to actually say it.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Pam</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">pam</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>[in Meredith's van] I have never seen so many parking tickets.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Pam</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">pam</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>All right, this is just messed up.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Darryl</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">darryl</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>No, you know what's messed up? This situation all up in here is what's messed up! We need to brainstorm, we need to get out of this! Brain hurricane. Come on, think.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>All right.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Darryl</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">darryl</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>What do we got?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Um...</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Pam</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">pam</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>[opening door] Hey guys, sorry I'm late.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Kelly</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">kelly</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>We're not going for yogurt.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Pam</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">pam</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>It's okay, she's cool, she also whistle-blew.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Guys, I couldn't help it, it is so boring where we work. I mean, it's as interesting as a morgue. It might be less interesting than a morgue.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Kelly</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">kelly</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Hey, hey, it's as interesting as a morgue.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Of course I'm the leak! I think I Tweeted it! I can't control what I say to people, I spend the whole day talking! I mean, I video chat, I Skype, I text, I Tweet, I phone, I Woof...</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Kelly</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">kelly</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Woof is a site that I'm launching to be the last word in social networking. For just $12.99 a month, Woof links up all your communication portals so you are always within reach. It's part of the dog pack, as I call it. But, look, why tell you when I can show you. [types on his phone] I just sent myself a Woof. [fax machine makes noise, several windows pop up on computer behind Ryan with accompanying sounds, including barking]</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Ryan</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">ryan</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>[on phone] Ryan, you have a Woof on line 1.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Erin</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">erin</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Thank you, Erin. Woof!</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Ryan</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">ryan</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Okay, here's what we do. I say we just smash all the computers. We destroy the evidence. No evidence, no case.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Wouldn't we get fired for smashing all the computers?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Pam</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">pam</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>No. Okay, not all the computers, just our computers.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>That idea sucks.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Kelly</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">kelly</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I don't think that's a good idea.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Pam</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">pam</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Just don't say no.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Michael, you know you don't have to turn us all in. All you need is one scapegoat.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Darryl</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">darryl</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Uh, if you turn me in, I'm turning in Darryl.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Kelly</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">kelly</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>That's just what we need, another black man in prison. You know, let's just...</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Nobody's going to prison, okay? Um... all right, Michael, you need to convince Jo to go easy on us. And then we'll all confess once we know our jobs are safe.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Pam</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">pam</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Okay. You can count on me.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>[sees Toby banging on the vending machine] Let me give you a hand.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Dwight</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">dwight</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I'm hungry.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Toby</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">toby</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Ready? [they pull the vending machine towards them; Dwight's phone rings] Got it? Oh shoot. Got it? [walks away, opens phone] Dwight Schrute.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Dwight</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">dwight</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>[on phone] The property you're looking at is in great shape. By the way, it has a very spacious basement office.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Realtor</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="background">realtor</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Basement office? You mean like a lair?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Dwight</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">dwight</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Hey Jo.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Michael.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I was thinking about our little leak problem. I was up all lunch thinking about what we should do to this individual. You know what I think we should do? We make 'em come to work, and we work 'em, and we make 'em sit next to all the people they screwed over. And, and we pay 'em but we make 'em feel like they did something really wrong. The one question I have is, do we give them a Christmas bonus? I say yes, it's Christmas, but right after they're back in the thick of it.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Michael Scott... what do you know?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>What?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>It doesn't matter what I know.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>If it doesn't matter, then tell me.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Why?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Because I want to deal with it the way I deal with it.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Well, deal with this. [crosses arms]</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Empathize with me for a moment. I came up here with a big problem, and now I got a branch manager who's giving me the silent treatment... Speak to me... speak. [Jo's dog barks] Come with me.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>What?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>[as Michael and Jo leave] Are you leaving? Oh, am I... should I continue with the investigation?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Gabe</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">gabe</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Are you going to kill me?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Hahahahahaha.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>[on phone] I just need you to come by later and sign a few forms.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Realtor</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="background">realtor</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Okay.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Dwight</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">dwight</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>What time works for you? [Dwight looks across the street] Mr. Schrute, what time works?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Realtor</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="background">realtor</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Cancel it. I want you to make an offer at seventeen twenty-five Slough Avenue. Make 'em an offer they can't refuse. No, on second thought, low ball them. Don't call me 'til you have it.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Dwight</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">dwight</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>But... [Dwight closes phone]</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Realtor</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="background">realtor</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>[on Jo's jet] Are we going some place far away? I know you said no questions, but... I have an early dinner that I need to get to... with the Chief of Police.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I'm very relieved to learn it wasn't you.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Creed</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">creed</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>All right. Uh, Stan, you're up.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Gabe</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">gabe</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>It wasn't me.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Stanley</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">stanley</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>What a rich timbre your voice has. Okay, I am prepared to conclude the investigation. And... you did it. [nods at Andy]</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Gabe</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">gabe</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>What? Based on what?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Andy</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">andy</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Uh, just all the evidence. And it really seems like it was you. Can we all agree to say that it was Andy for now, and sit with it, see how it feels?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Gabe</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">gabe</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>All right. Sounds good.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Dwight</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">dwight</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Guys, I think that seems a little unfair. I mean, I feel like we don't definitely know it was Andy.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jim</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jim</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Yeah. You know, I mean, for all we know it could have been... Jim.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Andy</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">andy</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Really?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jim</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jim</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Michael.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I have rights.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Let's just talk.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I am not going to tell you anything.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Honey, you don't seem like your normal self.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Well, I'm going through a little bit of a rough patch.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Mama Jo knew there was something up.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Whole year, actually. My favorite restaurant closed down.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Oh, I hate that.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>And my new favorite restaurant sucks... I bought a video camera last year, and I was looking at the tapes, and there were only like twelve minutes that I felt was worth taping the whole year. And most of that was just birds in my condo complex. What is that? ... I miss Holly.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Who's Holly?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Holly Flax from the Nashua branch. Best HR rep that Dunder Mifflin has ever seen. It's not been a blockbuster year for me financially. My Blockbuster stock is down.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Well, I think that the real question is:</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Kevin</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">kevin</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I may have heard from an old client, and I may have immediately started spreading the news to other clients and potential clients, yeah. But I'm not here to talk about that. I am here to talk about Suck It. Suck it.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">David Wallace</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">david-wallace</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Gabe, I told you all about the printers.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Andy</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">andy</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I mean, it could be you, Gabe. I mean, that's the point.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jim</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jim</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Yes, it's totally obvious.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Pam</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">pam</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I think we all can agree that it's either Gabe or Angela. [flips a coin] It's Angela. Get her, boys.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Creed</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">creed</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Hey guys, uh, sorry to interrupt. I just wanted to say goodbye to everyone. Through Teach for America, I'm going to go down to Detroit and teach, uh, inner city kids about computers.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Nick</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="recurring">nick</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Uh, not now.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Gabe</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">gabe</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Oh yeah, it's just that my friends are in the car waiting, so I thought I would...</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Nick</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="recurring">nick</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>[quietly] Phyllis, what's this guy's name again?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Stanley</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">stanley</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I don't know, is it Shadow or Garth, it's something weird, I...</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Phyllis</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">phyllis</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>My name is Nick.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Nick</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="recurring">nick</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Okay, well, Nick, we're in a meeting.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Angela</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">angela</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Okay, look, I get it, people. I'm the lame IT guy, and everybody hates me.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Nick</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="recurring">nick</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Hey, listen man, you can't take it personally.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jim</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jim</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>You called me man? I just said my name just now, did you forget it already?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Nick</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="recurring">nick</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>No... sport.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jim</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jim</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>You, you guys have fifteen parties a week, you can't learn my name?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Nick</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="recurring">nick</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey IT guy. Here's the story, champ. None of us have spent a lot of time getting to know you, okay? We liked the last guy, Siddiq, because he kept to himself, and we also thought he might have been a terrorist. You know what, I'm going to leave you with one other thought. Inner city kids use computers for two things, games and porn. So good luck wasting your life, lurch.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Dwight</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">dwight</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Thank you so much for that. I saw all your hard drives, and guess what? [gestures to Ryan] You're not a photographer. [gestures to Kelly] And you definitely can't fit into a size two. Darryl, man, you're on Facebook. Why you been telling people you're not on Facebook? People want to be your friend, man! All right? And you. [points to Andy] This guy, you're the one who told the press. You wrote an e-mail to the editor. I saw it, and I also saw a QuickTime movie of your little printer fire test on your hard drive. This guy's the snitch, he's the snitch. So that's it, check it out. [gives the finger]</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Nick</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="recurring">nick</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>You're going to believe that guy?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Andy</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">andy</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>When I was growing up, there was nothing better than being a big old business tycoon. And I thought I'd break that glass ceiling and be a hero to all those little girls out there... and they'd make a Barbie out of me.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Hmm, hmm.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>I, did I sell cheap printers? I do. But if I have to go out there in front of the press and make one of them public apology recalls, I mean, it's all I'll ever be remembered for. Nobody will want to play with my Barbie.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">jo</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>You know, I would be willing, under the right circumstances, to do that for you.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">michael</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Oh honey, surely you don't want that.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">jo</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>I, I surely do, and don't call me honey. [Jo laughs] You were playing too.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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</Scene>
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<Scene>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>I'm about to buy this building, you know.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Dwight</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="main">dwight</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>You don't say? I own a one-eighth share in a rental property down in Pittston.</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Hank</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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<Character type="recurring">hank</Character>
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</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>Well, I'm one-eighths proud of you... enjoy that chair for now... 'cause pretty soon, you will be on your feet, at Buckingham Palace.</QuoteText>
|
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<Speaker>
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<SpeakerText annotated="false">Dwight</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
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|
<Character type="main">dwight</Character>
|
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</Characters>
|
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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</Scene>
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|
<Scene>
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<Quote>
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|
<QuoteText>Hey Phyllis, have you seen my bag?</QuoteText>
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<Speaker>
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|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Andy</SpeakerText>
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<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">andy</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
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</Speaker>
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</Quote>
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<Quote>
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<QuoteText>[points to the ceiling] You deserve it.</QuoteText>
|
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<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Phyllis</SpeakerText>
|
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<Characters>
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|
<Character type="main">phyllis</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
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|
<Scene>
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<Quote>
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|
<QuoteText>Look, I didn't want houses and schools to burn down, and children to die. Does that make me a hero? I...</QuoteText>
|
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<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Andy</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">andy</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>[offscreen] No, it does not!</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Kevin</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">kevin</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Well, it doesn't make me the worst guy in the world, either.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Andy</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">andy</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>It does!</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Angela</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">angela</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Andy?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Erin</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">erin</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Hey.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Andy</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">andy</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I wanted to say that I think it was very brave of you to go to the press.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Erin</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">erin</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Uh, thanks. Yeah, you know, just seemed like the right thing to do.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Andy</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">andy</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Yeah.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Erin</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">erin</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>[to press] We at Sabre have betrayed the trust that we have built with our customers. We regret our slow response and our lapse in candor and judgment. At this time, we are issuing a full recall of all Sabre GH400 printers. We will not rest until this problem is solved. There will be no questions. Are there any questions?</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
<Scene>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Hey, I appreciate you reading that statement. You looked pretty up there.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>That was fun.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>I hope your rough patch ends soon.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Thanks. Today helped.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Well, give me a shout if I can brighten your life.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Okay. Hey, you could transfer Holly back from Nashua.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Michael</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">michael</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
<Quote>
|
|
<QuoteText>Let me see what I can do.</QuoteText>
|
|
<Speaker>
|
|
<SpeakerText annotated="false">Jo</SpeakerText>
|
|
<Characters>
|
|
<Character type="main">jo</Character>
|
|
</Characters>
|
|
</Speaker>
|
|
</Quote>
|
|
</Scene>
|
|
</SceneList>
|