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the-office/server/normalization/truth/episodes/6-19.xml
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<SceneList>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>[Michael grunts and strains while doing push-ups] Breathe. Work your core. Come on.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>How many is that?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Not counting the last one, 25.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Count the last one.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Ok, 25 and one girl push-up!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Oh, new record!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Okay.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Oh, what did you do today?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>I made a sale.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Oh, yeah, sitting on your big fat butt. Alright, that is the number to beat.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Meredith</Speaker>
<Text>What do we get if we do 'em?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>My respect. [everyone returns to work] Okay, I'll make it a little more interesting. Anyone who does more than 25 push-ups -</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>And one girl push-up.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Gets to go home. [everyone starts to do push-ups] Ooh! I say 'dance,' they say 'how high?' Here we go. Oh, no. No, no, no. Butt to high. [steps on Angela] Disqualified!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Angela</Speaker>
<Text>Ow!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>What do we got? Creed, disqualified.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Creed</Speaker>
<Text>[from desk chair] Oh, come on!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>19. [grunts] I had a really hard work out this morning.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>[Stanley straining and breathing heavily] Oh, wow, that is adorable!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Phyllis</Speaker>
<Text>Ten...</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Yeah, I'm betting one more.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Phyllis</Speaker>
<Text>Eleven, wow!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Good.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Everyone</Speaker>
<Text>[chanting] Stan-ley! Stan-ley! Stan-ley...</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Alright, alright. [chanting continues]</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Oscar</Speaker>
<Text>Essentially, what we have here is one of those stories where a mother lifts a car to save her baby.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Well, it's not exactly fair. He's got all of his weight that's helping him go down.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>25. Yeah! Come on, you can do it!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Phyllis</Speaker>
<Text>One more, one more! [cheers and applause]</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Oscar</Speaker>
<Text>You okay? You okay, Stanley?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Stanley</Speaker>
<Text>Excuse me.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>Wow. [applause]</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Oscar</Speaker>
<Text>Hey. Matt, right?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Matt</Speaker>
<Text>Hey, Oscar. You're here early.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Oscar</Speaker>
<Text>I always come in at 7.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Warehouse Guy</Speaker>
<Text>No, you don't.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Oscar</Speaker>
<Text>Well... Hey, uh, are you doing anything later tonight?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Matt</Speaker>
<Text>I don't know. I'm free. If you hear of anything going on, let me know.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Oscar</Speaker>
<Text>Yeah.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Oscar</Speaker>
<Text>Yeah, we talked this morning and we talked at Christmas. So, a little momentum there. [tries to open door, locked] Just a couple of hours to kill before work.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Darryl</Speaker>
<Text>Hey, what's up?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Oscar</Speaker>
<Text>Hey, nice office.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Darryl</Speaker>
<Text>Thanks, it's cool. So...</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Oscar</Speaker>
<Text>You know what we haven't done in a while? Happy hour. Upstairs, the warehouse, everybody just going out for a drink.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Darryl</Speaker>
<Text>Has that ever happened? Ever?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Oscar</Speaker>
<Text>Didn't we? I think we did.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Darryl</Speaker>
<Text>You want me to invite Matt?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Oscar</Speaker>
<Text>Yeah, the whole gang, Matt included.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Darryl</Speaker>
<Text>Look, just be straight with me, man. You can be gay with Matt, just be straight with me.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Oscar</Speaker>
<Text>So happy hour.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Darryl</Speaker>
<Text>Happy hour. My pleasure.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Oscar</Speaker>
<Text>All right.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Oscar</Speaker>
<Text>So what do you think?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Phyllis</Speaker>
<Text>Hmmm, I saw a new drink on TV I'd like to try. I'll ask Bob.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Phyllis</Speaker>
<Text>Yeah, I love going to bars with Bob. I tend to wear something low-cut, get men to flirt with me, and Bob beats 'em up. What?</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>A bunch of us are talking about happy hour.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>I would love, love, love to go. Only problem is, Pam's at home with the baby and I think she wants a night in.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>Oh, baloney.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>Good one.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>Ring her up.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>Absolutely, I will do that right now.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>I gotta tell you, this baby is amazing. She gets me out of everything. And I - and I love her. I also love her, very much.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>So some of the co-workers were thinking of going out tonight, but I told them-</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>[on phone] Yes! Yes! I would love to!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>Ha! Knew it!</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>[through phone] It's been so long since I've been with adults. I am so excited to see everybody. Creed, Ryan. Oh my God, Stanley! Stanley's going to be there. Yes, oh my God!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>I did not see this coming.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>Erin, I need you to fax this and get me a confirmation, pronto. [whispering] Are you going later?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Erin</Speaker>
<Text>Sure, if you are.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>Yes.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Erin</Speaker>
<Text>Talk to me that way again, and I'll cut your face off.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>Whoa.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>We recently struck up a romantic relationship. And, um... but we're kinda keeping it quiet for now 'cause it's still kind of a new thing. It's a little delicate, and we just don't want all the drama.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Erin</Speaker>
<Text>Exactly.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>Yeah, cause when everyone knows- [knock on window, open blinds to Kevin giggling and making sexual gestures] That's actually pretty funny, but in general, you know.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Erin</Speaker>
<Text>Quiet.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>Hey, boss man.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Yes?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>A bunch of us are going to get some drinks, you in?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Ladies and gentleman, it is quitting time.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>I'm sorry, I meant later.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Ok, yes. Sure.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>For happy hour?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>No, I got that.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>Trying to get a head count.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>I am in.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>All right, yes! It's a deal.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>It's a deal.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>Oh, hey, I invited my friend Julie.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>Okay.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>I want her to meet Michael.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>Why?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>They're both single, I have a sense they might-</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>You've been gone for a long time.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>It is not that. Kevin! Oh!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Kevin</Speaker>
<Text>Yeah! [hugs Pam]</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>Hey, how are you?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Kevin</Speaker>
<Text>Oh, I missed you so much.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>Aw!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Kevin</Speaker>
<Text>Yeah!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>Yeah!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Kevin</Speaker>
<Text>Waaah! [starts to make crying baby noises]</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Kevin</Speaker>
<Text>When a new mom hears a baby cry, her you-know-what's fill up with you-know-what, and then her shirt gets, you know... that would be funny.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Oh, wow, I cannot believe this is happening. This is everything I dreamed. Oh, my God! [laughs]</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>Easy.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>It's not a birthday, it's not a good-bye party...</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>Oh, hey, Pam and I are gonna go play pool with one of her friends, and we need a fourth.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Sucks to be you.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>Would you like to be our fourth?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>That would be sublime.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>All right.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Darryl</Speaker>
<Text>So, the guy shows me the deck he's built. And I'm like, 'I'll call this a deck if it'll make you happy, but this is just a porch without a roof.' [laughter, Oscar looks toward door] It was ridiculous man, it was like-you could maybe get two chairs on the thing. Two lawn chairs.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>Hey, Michael.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Yes.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>This is my friend Julie.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Hello, how are you?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Julie</Speaker>
<Text>Good. Hi.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>What is a nice girl like you hanging out with these bums for? [Julie laughs]</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>Julie laughs at everything.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Julie</Speaker>
<Text>So you work with Pam and Jim?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Oh, no, no. Pam and Jim work for me. And if they win, they are fired.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Julie</Speaker>
<Text>[giggles] I should hope not.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>No. No, not really. Not really, but they better not win.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Isabel</Speaker>
<Text>Hey.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>Hey, Isabel, you made it. Oh, my goodness.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Isabel</Speaker>
<Text>Of course.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>You want to play pool?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Isabel</Speaker>
<Text>Um, I'm gonna do a lap. See if I know anyone.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>Ok.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Angela</Speaker>
<Text>And then they said the most ridiculous thing about Anderson Cooper, which I do not have the decency to repeat, but trust me when I tell you that-</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Hold that thought. Well, well, well. If it isn't Isabel.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Isabel</Speaker>
<Text>Mm-hmm.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>What's a girl like you doing in a place like this?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Isabel</Speaker>
<Text>A girl like me is why a guy like you comes to a place like this.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Ooh, I love repartee.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Isabel</Speaker>
<Text>Do you?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Usually means there's a battle scene coming.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>So, what do you do?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Julie</Speaker>
<Text>I am an ESL teacher.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Really?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Julie</Speaker>
<Text>Yeah.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>See, I didn't think you could teach that. I thought that was something you were born with. What am I thinking right now?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Julie</Speaker>
<Text>Are you thinking that I said 'ESP?'</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Yes. I feel like an idiot. Awesome.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Julie</Speaker>
<Text>I was a little nervous when Pam told me he was her boss, but he doesn't act like a boss at all. If I had a boss like that, we'd never get anything done.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>So what do you think?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>About what?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>About Julie?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>She's nice.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>Yeah.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Yeah.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>So you like her?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Uh, yeah, sure.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>So Pam was right?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>About what?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>About you two hitting it off.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>[removing tie] Well, apparently, Michael Scott is on a date. And that, that my friend, changes everything. [puts on backwards golf cap]</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Hide</Speaker>
<Text>My brother, good head, bad heart. Good head, bad heart.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Oscar</Speaker>
<Text>I know.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>Hey, Michael, where have you been? [Michael shoots pool ball up into their faces]</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>Hey, you're supposed to hit the white ball first, buddy. Nice one. Can I talk to you for a sec? All right. Everything ok?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>Why are you wearing a hat now?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Guys, come on, I'm on a date. Let me do my thang.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Hi, I'm date Mike. Nice to meet me. How do you like your eggs in the morning? [tries to wink]</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>You want to just make a run for it?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>Maybe.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Kevin</Speaker>
<Text>Waaaah! [Kevin fake-cries into Pam's chest] Waaaaah! Mommy!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>What is happening?</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>Whoa! What is crackin?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Ryan</Speaker>
<Text>Guys, one second. [on dance videogame]</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Kelly</Speaker>
<Text>We're focusing, we're focusing, we can't talk.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Erin</Speaker>
<Text>What's this game?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Ryan</Speaker>
<Text>One second.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>Yeah, how do you play?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Ryan</Speaker>
<Text>Guys, guys, guys, please. [game ends] Ok, all right, it's all yours now.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Kelly</Speaker>
<Text>Only three tickets.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Ryan</Speaker>
<Text>If we save 'em up, we can get more than a sticker this time.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Kelly</Speaker>
<Text>Stop telling me how to spend my tickets.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Ryan</Speaker>
<Text>I know, but you wanted the big thing.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>Wow, can you imagine what people would say if they saw us dancing together?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Erin</Speaker>
<Text>Oh I know.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>They'd be like, 'what's up with those two?'</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Erin</Speaker>
<Text>'Hey, guys, get a bedroom already.'</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>'Did we miss the wedding?' Um, I got it-I'll do this, and you play the racing game, and then we'll switch.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Erin</Speaker>
<Text>Yes, okay. Yeah, that's smart.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>No drama. Ok.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Isabel</Speaker>
<Text>Oh, air hockey, basketball, we could play that. Oh, whack-a-mole.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Any brothers or sisters?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Isabel</Speaker>
<Text>Three brothers.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Really?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Isabel</Speaker>
<Text>Two are in the Marines, one's a cop.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Vegetarian?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Isabel</Speaker>
<Text>No. I love meat.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>What's your blood type?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Isabel</Speaker>
<Text>O-negative. Universal donor.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Universal donor. [startled by Angela, curses]</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Angela versus Isabel. Height, advantage Isabel. Birthing hips, advantage Isabel. Remaining child-bearing years, advantage Isabel. Legal obligation, advantage Angela.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Hey, guys, guys, guys. [steals a cherry from waitress passing buy] Watch this. Ready?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Julie</Speaker>
<Text>What are you doing?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>I'm tying a knot in the stem with my tongue.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>Michael, you don't have to do this.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>[choking] Wow. Oh, wow, that was close.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>I would say I kind of have an unfair advantage because I watch reality dating shows like a hawk, and I learn. I absorb information from the strategies of the winners and the losers. Actually, I probably learn more from the losers.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Phyllis</Speaker>
<Text>Hey, you two having fun?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>Did you tell them?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Erin</Speaker>
<Text>No.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>This is exactly what I don't want, the drama. I don't want the drama!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Erin</Speaker>
<Text>I get it.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Isabel</Speaker>
<Text>[Isabel and Dwight playing whack-a-mole] You are amazing at this. How did you get so good?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Whacking moles. Hit 'em on the head. Whack. Say it with me.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Isabel</Speaker>
<Text>Whack!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Extend the fingers more.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Isabel</Speaker>
<Text>Whack!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Good.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Angela</Speaker>
<Text>This looks like a hoot.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Hey, monkey, how you doing?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Angela</Speaker>
<Text>Whack.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Listen, can I talk to you for a second?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Angela</Speaker>
<Text>Okay.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Look, I've been thinking. We had a good run. We really did. But you don't need to worry about this whole contract thing anymore.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Angela</Speaker>
<Text>It's no worry.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>It's just that we both-we want different things. You know, I want a big family.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Angela</Speaker>
<Text>I could see enjoying that.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>No, no, no, no. I want a big family. Tall. Thick. A big, physically big family. Listen, you go have fun. You're off the hook.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Angela</Speaker>
<Text>But we signed the contract.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Dissolved. Don't worry, you're free. Okay? Okay. See you later.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Angela</Speaker>
<Text>We both-you didn't dup-</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>[Michael playing air guitar on pool table] Wow. Maybe we should tell her that he's not normally like this.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>Maybe it should come from a man.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>Maybe it should come from a note... with flowers...tomorrow.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>Hello.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Hello.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>Hi.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Hi.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>You wanna pay 400 bucks to re-felt this table?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Yeah, why don't you send the bill to 23 I Don't Care Lane, Scranton, Pennsylvania?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>Hey, Michael, why don't you just get down.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Hey, she can tell I'm on a date, right? Right? I'm just having fun.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>Ted, are we having fun?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Really? You told on me. That's lame.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bouncer</Speaker>
<Text>We got a problem?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Yes. Homelessness. What?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>All right, go.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Where?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>Get out. Now.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Okay, all right. Okay, whoa. I'm just kidding around. I'm sorry.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>Ok, um, why don't we just finish the game? Michael, it's your shot.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>She can't talk to us that way.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>You guys are stripes, I think...</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>You let somebody talk to you like that, where does it stop?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>It stopped.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Well, I am starting it again!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>Do you guys want some food? The wings are really good here.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Hey, you embarrassed my friends in front of me and I'm gonna need you to go back over to the table and apologize.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>Then I am sorry that I didn't kick you out.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>I am here with my employees. I am here on a date. Hello.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>Well, uh, I'm the manager here, sir.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Well, it just so happens that I am a manager too. And the way I manage people is that I touch their hearts and souls with humor, with love and maybe a dash of razzle-dazzle. And I don't see that from you.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>Is that how you do it?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Yes it is. I am writing a book about it.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>Really? How much have you written?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>I've written all of it... in my head.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>Oh.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>If you're really interested, it's called 'Somehow I Manage' and there's going to be a picture of me on the cover, shrugging, with my sleeves rolled up.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>Huh. Have you read Lee Iacocca's? It's a classic.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Read it? I own it. But no, I have not read it.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>Dude, tonight! You're not going to want to put it down. It's gonna make you want to go out and buy a Chrysler tomorrow.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>I own a Chrysler.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>Shut up.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>No, you shut up.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>What's your drink?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Grenadine.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>What?</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>We just have to throw everyone off the scent a little, so follow my lead.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Erin</Speaker>
<Text>Okay.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>[Andy sits at table with another woman] Hi.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Girl at table</Speaker>
<Text>Hi.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>I don't normally do this, but...</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Girl at table</Speaker>
<Text>Do what?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>Just sit down next to a beautiful woman and start talking to myself to confuse other people.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Erin</Speaker>
<Text>[Erin sits with man, rubs her hand on his thigh] Hey, big boy. Do you like it when I do that?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>[Andy spits out his drink] What are you doing?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Erin</Speaker>
<Text>What we said to do.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>We didn't say we were gonna, like, start groping strangers!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Erin</Speaker>
<Text>I was flirting with a man.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>Get in here. [Andy and Erin go into photo booth] Where did you learn to talk like that?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Erin</Speaker>
<Text>The movies. I don't know.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>Well, what movie? Black Snake Moan?</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>I manage a paper company-Dunder Mifflin/Sabre.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>You have a card?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>I did. I actually put it in your bowl.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>Stanley Hudson?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>No, no.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>Whoa, a lot of Stanley Hudson's in here.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>No, it's Michael Scott.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>Michael Scott?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>He is I.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>You just won yourself a lunch.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Oh, hey guys. [thumbs up]</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Julie</Speaker>
<Text>I think I'm gonna go.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>Really?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Julie</Speaker>
<Text>Yeah.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>I'm sorry, he's not usually like that.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Julie</Speaker>
<Text>What's he usually like?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>He's more, just... like... you can go.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Julie</Speaker>
<Text>Yeah.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>All right.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>Okay. Bye.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>See ya. Nice girl.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>Yeah.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Hey, Julie! You having fun? [Julie leaves]</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Bar Manager</Speaker>
<Text>So... when are you coming in for that free lunch? You're gonna want to come in on a day that I'm working. Uh, maybe I can hear more about that book, too.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Darryl</Speaker>
<Text>Hey, man, you put together a pretty fun night for everybody. I saw you talking to Hide. Did you hear that dude's life story? It's amazing, right?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Oscar</Speaker>
<Text>I couldn't understand a word he said.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Darryl</Speaker>
<Text>Let me tell you something, Oscar. All right, Matt's an okay dude, but he's a dummy. You guys got nothing in common.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Oscar</Speaker>
<Text>Maybe you're right. I should count myself lucky.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Matt</Speaker>
<Text>Hey, what's up?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Oscar</Speaker>
<Text>There he is! Hey, hey, hey.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Matt</Speaker>
<Text>Anyone up for some hoops?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Oscar</Speaker>
<Text>Sure. Hoops!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Matt</Speaker>
<Text>Let's do it.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Oscar</Speaker>
<Text>Hoop it up, right.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>This is not what I want my relationship to look like. [holding photo strip of he and Erin fighting]</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>[over PA] Hi, ladies and gentlemen. My name is Andrew Bernard, and I've been on two dates with Erin Hannon and they went well, and there will probably be more. Thank you.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>You know, it got to the point where keeping it a secret was just too much drama. And I hate drama, so there you go.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Erin</Speaker>
<Text>[laughs] You love drama.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Andy</Speaker>
<Text>I know, I do, right? I'm a total drama queen.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>With this move, he can't get you.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Isabel</Speaker>
<Text>Well, I think that he could counter that move. The Scranton strangler is a professional strangler.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Oh, please. I wish he'd come after me. I would be like-aaah!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Angela</Speaker>
<Text>Dwight Schrute! Dwight Kurt Schrute.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Sh-what?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Angela</Speaker>
<Text>You are hereby served with a summons to appear in Lackawanna county court.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>No, no, no. [trying to talk over her] Blah blah blah blah!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Angela</Speaker>
<Text>For breach of contract with Angela Noelle Martin.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Isabel</Speaker>
<Text>What are you talking about?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>What are you-</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Angela</Speaker>
<Text>Dwight recently entered into a contract with me, establishing intent to conceive and raise a child with me.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Angela...</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Angela</Speaker>
<Text>Did he not tell you that?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>You're really putting me in an awkward position here.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Angela</Speaker>
<Text>Do you plan on raising a child with me? Or do you plan on breaking this contract?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>Angela, not here!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Angela</Speaker>
<Text>Dwight?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Isabel</Speaker>
<Text>Whack! [Isabel smacks Angela on forehead]</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Angela</Speaker>
<Text>You'll see me in small claims court!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Dwight</Speaker>
<Text>You are an impressive specimen.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Isabel</Speaker>
<Text>Thank you. [Dwight and Isabel kiss]</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Kelly</Speaker>
<Text>[crying] Then, I spilled my drink, and they wouldn't give me a refill.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>Oh-oh, gosh. Oh.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>You all right?</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>Okay, we have to get home.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Kevin</Speaker>
<Text>Yeah!</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>Halperts, wait up. Oh, what a great night. Got to hang out with my peeps. Sort of did okay with a new young lady.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Jim</Speaker>
<Text>Actually, you didn't.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Pam</Speaker>
<Text>Not at all.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Michael</Speaker>
<Text>I think I did. But I can't take all of the credit. Some of the credit is due, in fact, to my good friend, Date Mike. Nice to meet me.</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
<Scene>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Darryl</Speaker>
<Text>Tell 'em your story, Hide.</Text>
</Quote>
<Quote>
<Speaker>Hide</Speaker>
<Text>In Japan, heart surgeon. Number one. Steady hand. One day, yakuza boss need new heart. I do operation. But, mistake! Yakuza boss die. Yakuza very mad. I hide in fishing boat, come to America. No English, no food, no money. Darryl give me job. Now I have house, American car, and new woman. Darryl save life. My big secret: I kill yakuza boss on purpose. I good surgeon. The best!</Text>
</Quote>
</Scene>
</SceneList>
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