[sitting on the roof of the office building] Well, I'm moving to Colorado to start my new life with Holly. Just up here, getting used to the altitude. Michael michael
[walking up] Michael? Dwight dwight
Yes? Michael michael
I've got a treat for you! Dwight dwight
Ahh, thank you. Like a butler. Michael michael
Colorado specialty, Rocky Mountain Oysters. Dwight dwight
[Michael takes one and bites] Oh, these do not taste like oysters. Michael michael
[angrily] That's because they're Not oysters, they're bull testicles! I cut them off fresh this morning! [Michael spits it out] Hah! Dwight dwight
Sick freak! What is wrong with you? Michael michael
What is wrong with you? I'm the sick freak? After what you did? You expect to be buttled? You didn't recommend me?! Dwight dwight
I don't own Dunder Mifflin, okay? [Dwight scoffs] The job was not mine to give. [sighs] Look, I need your advice on something. I am told that there are bears in the Rockies. Michael michael
Where did you hear that? Obvious XM Radio? Dwight dwight
Well, I was just thinking that maybe I should keep a salami in my pocket... Michael michael
Great idea. Dwight dwight
...in order to feed the bears. Michael michael
Especially if you think that life would be better without Legs! Dwight dwight
How do you mean? Michael michael
Black Bears can smell a salami at five miles Michael, what are you thinking?! And they run faster than a horse, so if you were thinking about outrunning one on a horse I would try a cheetah. You, in tight pants, Michael, are a salami to a Black Bear. Do you understand? [Michael nods in agreement] You're like a giant walking salami! Dwight dwight
Okay, so no salami in the pants. How about a pepperoni? Michael michael
Any kind of meat that you can possibly name! Dwight dwight
Okay. Michael michael
[with Michael in his office] You're not gonna take all these toys are you? DeAngelo deangelo
Hm? Michael michael
I mean you don't have a job lined up, so it's not like you have a desk to put 'em on. DeAngelo deangelo
Well I have interviews. Michael michael
That's nice. [reaches and a grabs a toy truck] How 'bout that truck? Can I have this little truck? I was thinking I might... glue a stapler on top. Or put a hole here, stick pens in it. [Michael gives an obviously fake smile] You okay? DeAngelo deangelo
Yes. Yes, you know what? Take my favorite truck. Sure. Michael michael
You know what? Uh, it's your last couple days, I'm gonna get out of your hair. DeAngelo deangelo
Oh you don't, that's- Michael michael
I will be in the break room. DeAngelo deangelo
That sounds good. Thank you. Michael michael
Dead man walking. DeAngelo deangelo
Sad? No, no, no. I don't leave 'til tomorrow, so... Tomorrow I will be a wreck. Michael michael
[sees Andy walk into the Men's Room and follows him in] Stay away from Erin! [cornering him in the bathroom] Gabe gabe
Hey! Andy andy
I'm your boss! Gabe gabe
Why don't you, uh, stay away from me? Andy andy
No, I'm gonna stand where I want. Okay? You don't wanna get on my bad side! I've seen some horrible things! I own over two hundred horror movies! Gabe gabe
Okay! That's so weird! Just go away! Andy andy
No! You go away! [storms out, toilet flushes, Jim exits the bathroom] Gabe gabe
[weak] Hi Tuna. Andy andy
So you guys are filming people when they go to the bathroom now? Jim jim
[in the conference room with Pam, Angela, and Meredith] How about cupcakes? Phyllis phyllis
Please. Angela angela
What's wrong with cupcakes? Pam pam
Everything. Angela angela
[walking in] There they are! Party Planning Committee together again! Michael michael
Well we all wanted to plan your goodbye party. We thought this would be easier. Pam pam
We thought. Pam pam
It's an experiment. Angela angela
The three of us have all been chairmen before. Phyllis phyllis
So this is the dream team. Pam pam
[walking up behind the glass] Hey! What are you saying?! Meredith meredith
The dream team... and Meredith. Angela angela
[to Michael] We decided on the ice cream. Mint chocolate chip, your favorite. Meredith meredith
Mmm! Michael michael
Yeah that was a surprise... Phyllis phyllis
You know what, I'm thinking maybe we should get ice cream that everybody'll like. How about vanilla? Let's get vanilla. Michael michael
[surprised] Okay. Pam pam
Tomorrow I want everyone to have a good time. No drama. And as for today, just a typical day. Alright? Michael michael
Should we get toppings? Pam pam
What do you like Pam? Michael michael
[confused] What? Pam pam
What kind of toppings would you like? Michael michael
Hot fudge? Pam pam
Sounds good. Fudge it up! [all seem surprised at Michael's behavior] Michael michael
[holding up his "World's Best Boss Mug"] I bought this for myself. And yesterday, they gave me this. [holds up a Dundie that reads, 'World's Best Boss 2011, Michael G. Scott', throws his mug into the garbage can and places his Dundie at the front of his desk] I still need something to drink out of though. Michael michael
[pulls out a list of everyone in the office, then puts it back in his jacket] Attention everyone, before I leave tomorrow I would like to reveal a secret I have kept for over twenty years. A secret about Phyllis. Michael michael
Please Michael. Phyllis phyllis
When Phyllis was in high school, she was so... cute. [Phyllis looks relieved] And she still is. Michael michael
I thought he knew about the baby I gave away. Phyllis phyllis
[holds up mittens she's knitting] Look Michael, it's a going away present so your hands won't get cold. Phyllis phyllis
Ahh. Michael michael
It's almost done, but you can't get them wet, and they can't be dry-cleaned either. You have to hand wash without water, wring-dry gently, and use a hairdryer on cool. Phyllis phyllis
[hesitantly] Sounds great, I just think it's great. Oh, I have gifts as well! [goes into his office and comes out with a bag] And I will start, by giving the first gift to Phyllis! Phyllis, you are shy and sweet, and you don't often speak your mind, but you should. Because you have great ideas. So Phyllis, I am giving you this, so you can always remember to speak your mind. [presents to her a mouth wind-up chattering toy] Michael michael
It's cute. [plays with it] Phyllis phyllis
Stanley, you love your Sudoku and your puzzles, I bestow upon you, my felt. [gives Stanley a small felt table] May you never lose the fun loving quality in life. Michael michael
Where's the rest of it, it's got no balls. Stanley stanley
Well, okay... And Andy, Andy who needs confidence that he is a great salesman. I give you, my clients, our ten most important accounts. [other salesmen look outraged] Michael michael
Wow. Andy andy
[angry] Yeah wow! Stanley stanley
You know I'm the worst salesman here right? Andy andy
But you're the best salesman, on the inside. Michael michael
What does that even mean? Phyllis phyllis
You sold us all on Andy, a product that nobody wanted. Michael michael
I'm gonna lose 'em. Andy andy
You're not gonna lose them. Michael michael
I promise you that I will. Andy andy
Just do your best! I have faith in you. Michael michael
[as Michael walks away, Stanley whispers angrily to Andy] Gimme those clients! Stanley stanley
No. Andy andy
[to Dwight] Do you believe that?! Phyllis phyllis
I've given up expecting Michael to do the right thing. Or the decent thing. Or even the comprehensible thing. Dwight dwight
I used to be obese. Once you've conquered obesity, everything else is easy. Life literally moves in slow motion. I'm not saying I'm superman, but, let me just put it this way. If I were shot in the head, I'm pretty sure everything would be fine. I almost welcome it. [winks] DeAngelo deangelo
Kevin, I have something for you. Michael michael
Oh! [Michael unrolls it to reveal it is a caricature of Kevin as a pig eating pizza] Kevin kevin
You know who that is? Michael michael
Oh... Kevin kevin
[rips the poster in half] Don't be a caricature Kevin, never be a caricature. How did that feel when I tore that up? Michael michael
Better... Kevin kevin
Good, stand up. [Kevin does so] You will be thin. You Won't drool over pizza like an animal anymore. Michael michael
But... Kevin kevin
You will find love. Michael michael
Michael, I'm pretty much okay with who I am now. Kevin kevin
Don't be. You should never settle for who you are. [moving on] Oscar, Oscar, Oscar! Oscar, you are- Michael michael
I just lost Porter Hardware! I just, I lost 'em! Andy andy
[quietly groans] Okay, you know what? Just do your best buddy! Okay, Oscar, you are very smart, and you have a gigantic education. And, I think of you as my scarecrow, because you gave me a brain. So that's why I made you this. [takes a sack tied in the upper middle making a crude head, with a face drawn on, obviously the product of poor craftsmanship, Oscar pretends to like it] Michael michael
Thank you Michael. It's beautiful. Oscar oscar
[laughing] It looks like a [more laughing] It looks like it was made by a two year old monkey on a farm! He just accepted, accepted that I put all this work into it! [laughs more] He has the lowest opinion of me, of anybody! Michael michael
Was it just me, or did you think that we were going to have sex at some point? Michael michael
It was just you... Angela angela
How would you have wanted to do it? Okay, okay. You know what? Inappropriate. I am engaged happily, and you have landed yourself a Senator. Michael michael
State Senator. Oscar oscar
Mmhmm, bravo! Michael michael
Brava! Oscar oscar
You wanna see some pictures? I just got these. Angela angela
Sure! Michael michael
Uhm, these are, okay this is us at the theater. And antiquing! Oh, rollerblading. Angela angela
Who's that? Who's that guy? [points to second guy in the pictures] Michael michael
Oh, that's Thomas, Robert's aide. Angela angela
I guess this could be the one, huh? Michael michael
Yeah. [Oscar shakes his head no] Angela angela
[walking into the kitchen, DeAngelo is using the coffee machine to cook chicken covered in melted chocolate] Hey. Andy andy
[hurriedly, while hiding the chocolate covered chicken] Hey! DeAngelo deangelo
I'm going to be dropping out on one of our biggest clients this afternoon and I could use some back up. Andy andy
Let's rip it up homes. [smacks top of the door frame with his hand, leaving a chocolate hand outline] DeAngelo deangelo
[Andy walks by with DeAngelo, says quietly after he leaves] Walk away bitch. Gabe gabe
[Michael is leaving the accounting area] Oh Michael! Where do you want your last pay check sent? Oscar oscar
My last pay check? Michael michael
You have an address yet in Colorado? Oscar oscar
No. Michael michael
What town do Holly's parents live in? Oscar oscar
I'm not sure, um, Mountainton? Michael michael
Sounds beautiful! Kevin kevin
[Michael sits alone eating at the back of the kitchen, Pam comes in with Jim, Creed and Kevin] You should do more stuff like that. Pam pam
I'm going to! Kevin kevin
[to Michael] Hey! It's almost your last day, come sit with us. Jim jim
Nah, I'm almost done. Michael michael
You sure? Jim jim
Yeah. Michael michael
So I'm going to Carbondale this afternoon to get a new bulk shredder. Pam pam
Finally! That old shredder sucked. Kevin kevin
It's a good shredder, it just keeps breaking. Pam pam
Yeah, it won't shred magazines. Kevin kevin
It's not supposed to shred magazines Kevin. Pam pam
I know... Kevin kevin
Did you break the shredder Kevin? Jim jim
No, it's just... that old shredder sucks. [Michael looks tearful] Just get one that'll shred magazines. Kevin kevin
I don't think any of them are supposed to shred magazines. Pam pam
[crying] I can't do this. All the channels are gonna be different there. I'm not gonna be able to find my shows. I'm not going to start improv at level one, and I don't think my credits will transfer. Ugh, and you know what? I just figured out where I was supposed to go to vote. [picks World's Best Boss mug out of the trashcan and puts it back on his desk] I gotta call her, and I'm going to tell her, that I cannot come. [dials on his phone] Michael michael
[on phone] Hello there! Holly holly
Hi. What is the name of our town? Michael michael
Boulder. Is something wrong? Are you okay? Holly holly
No, no. I just needed to hear your voice. Michael michael
[Yoda voice] Oh you mean this? Holly holly
[laughing] Yes. [Olive Oyl impression] Yes my hero! Michael michael
[deep man voice] I'll pay the rent! [Michael laughs] Okay, my mom's looking at me and she has no sense of humor. It's a joke mom! Holly holly
[laughing] Ohh, I miss you. Michael michael
Well I'll see you tonight. I'll pick you up outside baggage claim. Holly holly
Okay. I'll see you tonight. I love you. Michael michael
I love you too. Holly holly
[hangs up and composes himself] Yes, so I know I told everybody that tomorrow is my last day, but I'm, I'm gonna be leaving tonight. I head to the airport at four. [looks at the list of members of the office, with some names crossed out] And I have said goodbye to half of them. Michael michael
Well you know Michael, I have a brother in Boulder. Rory Flenderson. You should look him up. Toby toby
[grimaces and nods, Toby nods back at him] Okay. Michael michael
[smiling] Okay. Toby toby
[walks over to Kelly] Kelly! Kelly? Kelly. Michael michael
[doing make up and irritated] What?! Kelly kelly
If I just went away right now, would that be the best gift that I could give you? Michael michael
Yes! Please! Please go away! And stop using that weird slow voice. Kelly kelly
[in Ryan's office, which is illuminated blue] She was once my girl, and she is your girl now. Michael michael
Wow. [camera pans over to show that the light is from Michael's St. Pauli Girl Sign, hanging in Ryan's office] Ryan ryan
Yeah. Michael michael
This is... totally unnecessary. Ryan ryan
You're not prone to seizures? Michael michael
No. Ryan ryan
[in conference room with the party planning committee] So Michael said we can do whatever we want cake-wise. What do we want? Pam pam
[quickly] Erotic. Meredith meredith
See? This is what happens. You can't let a stray dog into the house. Angela angela
Hmm, let's hear here out. I would like to hear more about these cakes. [Angela and Pam look uncomfortable] Phyllis phyllis
I know these Ethiopians that run a cake shop. Meredith meredith
Good God... Angela angela
They make these cakes, they're wild! I mean, they show everything! Meredith meredith
I don't, I don't think we sh- Pam pam
I know what you're thinking, but it's not just black, they do it all. And the women on these cakes, they're not just guy's fantasies. They have real, full women. It is refreshing. Meredith meredith
[stopping her] Okay, don't turn this into some feminist issue. Pam pam
As a person who buys a lot of erotic cakes, it feels good to be represented on one. Phyllis phyllis
You know what, I think we should get some other input. Pam pam
I think we should do cupcakes. I am one of the few people who looks hot eating a cupcake. Kelly kelly
Yeah, cupcakes. That's what I said. Phyllis phyllis
No! I'm not cleaning up a bunch of uneaten cupcake bottoms! You know, we don't really care about your opinion. You're just a tie-breaker. Angela angela
[sees Pam walking towards the door of the office] Um, Pam. Michael michael
Oh, hey Michael! I'm just going to go to Carbondale to price some shredders. I'll see you later. Pam pam
[disappointed] Okay... [Jim is confused] Michael michael
[walking into the women's bathroom, Gabe storms in after her] Gabe! Erin erin
I need to talk to you! Gabe gabe
You can't be in here. This is a lady's room! Erin erin
Erin, I respect your privacy, but I will follow you in here everytime you go if that's what it takes. [Creed walks out of one of the stalls] Gabe gabe
Hey Creed. Erin erin
Not cool man. [walks out] Creed creed
I really think you should leave. Erin erin
Someday, you are going to tell our grandchildren about how their grandfather won you back in a women's room. Gabe gabe
Can we talk about this later, I have to go. Erin erin
Just read the letter under your windshield wiper, it explains everything. Quick one. [leans in for a kiss] Gabe gabe
Gabe! Erin erin
Okay... [walks out embarrassed] Gabe gabe
[on video cam with his brother] Here's the thing Rory, I knew you guys would hit it off in an odd way. Toby toby
I can bring him a welcome basket. I'll surprise him. Rory rory
Do- Well you should give him a little time to settle in. But- Toby toby
Does he like jams? My shelves are over flowing with preserves. Rory rory
Well, no. He hates jams. Toby toby
[walking into Darryl's office] Darryl! Michael michael
Hey. Darryl darryl
I would like to give you, the only copy, of Somehow I Manage. [hands him a thin black folder] Unfinished. If there's anyone here who can finish it, it's you. Michael michael
That's sweet Mike. Let's see here. There's a chapter, called Gum. With one sentence. Everybody likes the guy who offers him a stick of gum. Darryl darryl
Mmmhmmm. It's true. Darryl, I have one last wish. I would like to use the bailer. Michael michael
No. Can't let you do that Mike. Darryl darryl
No problem. Worth a try. Michael michael
[in warehouse] Darryl said I could use the bailer because I'm leaving. Michael michael
No. Warehouse Guy warehouse-guy
[picks up a basketball and dribbles it away from the basket] Alright guys, well... see ya later warehouse. Catch you on the flippity flip. [throws the ball behind him and misses the basket, tries and misses several more times] Michael michael
[in car with Andy] okay, so what's our approach? You a veteran? Do I have a month to live? You gonna get married tomorrow? What? [Andy stares blankly] Hmm? DeAngelo deangelo
I thought we'd just talk about our customer service and exceptional paper quality. Andy andy
That's stupid. [laughing. Nervously, Andy laughs with him] DeAngelo deangelo
[joking] What do I know? Andy andy
[still laughing] What do you know? We gotta get psyched up! Okay? Guy? Let's get psyched! Is there an animal shelter on the way? DeAngelo deangelo
[confused] Yeah. Andy andy
Awesome! Ani Ani Shelto! Here we come. Do you know how to high-five? DeAngelo deangelo
Yeah! Andy andy
'Cause if you do now's the time. DeAngelo deangelo
[going for it] Alright. Andy andy
Not while I'm driving. DeAngelo deangelo
[still trying the backwards basket] Catch you guys- [forklift drives in front of the camera] Catch you guys on the filippity flip. [misses and picks it up again] Flippity flip! [misses again and grabs it back] Flippity flip! [makes it in, gets excited] Really? [composes himself] Okay, see ya guys! [walks away, containing his self-pleasure] Michael michael
[at the animal shelter with Andy] You know how I met Jo Bennett? And got started on my ladder of success? DeAngelo deangelo
No. I don't. Andy andy
[hands Andy a dog] I'm walking along, out of work. Again. Thinking to myself, 'I only have enough cash to by a sandwich, or get drunk. And I see this guy trying to steal this lady's dog! So I grab the dog. He runs off. She's so grateful, she hires me. DeAngelo deangelo
Awwhh, wow. Andy andy
Gimme that dog! That's not your dog! [takes the dog from a confused Andy] Yeah! Again. DeAngelo deangelo
Oh, okay... Andy andy
Gimme that damn dog you f***ing thief! Don't ever do It again! [Andy nods modestly] You hear me?! [Andy nods again] You feel that energy? DeAngelo deangelo
Mmhmmm. Andy andy
Wooo! Yeah! [parades in circles with the dog, pretends to whack Andy with it] [giving it to Andy] Okay, again. DeAngelo deangelo
I know that Gabe is young, and hot and everything. And he's begging me to reconsider, but I... I just think I'm in love with someone else. Erin erin
Kevin? Michael michael
Andy. Erin erin
Ahhhh... Michael michael
I wish I knew who my birth mother was, so she could just tell me who to choose. Erin erin
Maybe neither. Michael michael
I'm not attracted to Kevin. Erin erin
Erin, listen to me. You shouldn't rush into this. At all. And you know why? Because you are beautiful. And you are fun. And you are smart. [Erin is smiling] And when the right guy comes along, you'll know it. You will. [kisses her head] And you know what? You don't need a mom. Because you have my number, and you can call me anytime. Michael michael
[nods] Extension 147. Erin erin
N- Michael michael
I know. Erin erin
Okay. [both chuckling. Michael leaves Erin, looking thoughtful] Michael michael
[on the phone] You want the 27-26 or the 27-30? Phyllis phyllis
Phyllis. Phyllis, are my mittens done? Michael michael
No. [trying to finish her sale when Michael hangs up the phone] I'm on a sale! Phyllis phyllis
Listen to me. It's two p.m. From now until four, your priority is knitting. Knit like the wind. Michael michael
Okay... [Jim gives a knowing look to the camera] Phyllis phyllis
Dwight, I will be leaving tomorrow. [pulls out an envelope from his jacket] Michael michael
Yes. Dwight dwight
So I wanted to give you that. [hands him the envelope] It's a letter of recommendation. [Dwight looks eager. Michael nods to him and walks away] Michael michael
This is gonna be good. [eagerly reading the letter] To whom it may concern. [off to the side] Good, real personal. Thanks Michael. [reading again] The dictionary defines superlative as: Dwight dwight
[opening his trunk excitedly and gets out his paintball gear, takes his gun and looks for Michael, gives up, Michael jumps out of the dumpster shooting, they shoot each other, yell, laugh, and taunt, having a great time] Dwight dwight
[in the office, crosses Dwight off his list. He has paint in his messed up hair, and is containing his laughter] Michael michael
[giving his and Andy's pitch to a client] I would just like to start off saying, I have not worked with Mr. Andy Bernard for very long, I can say, is that he is no Michael Scott. I can't sit here and tell you he's gonna be a success. I can't sit here and tell you that he's even the best man for the job. [Andy looks awkward] But I can say this: DeAngelo deangelo
[Michael walks into the office, still a mess] Ahh, what happened to you? Jim jim
You should see the other guy. Michael michael
[smiles knowingly] Dwight dwight
[looks at the clock to see it is three o'clock] Jim where is Pam? Michael michael
Uhh, she's still pricing the whatevers. The shredders. Jim jim
But it is already three o'clock! [Michael leaves, Jim gives a knowing look to the camera] Michael michael
[walks into a movie theater showing The King's Speech] Pam pam
[in his office talking to Creed, Gabe, and Meredith in that order] Whether you're scared of dying, or dying Alone, or dying drunk in a ditch. Don't be. It's going to be okay. Michael michael
Yeah I was tripling up. There's not enough time in the day to have a special moment with everybody. Michael michael
[Gabe is still standing in front of Michael's desk] And you, why are you still here. Michael michael
[sounding hurt] I'm either going to quit today, or stay to make sure that Andy's career is destroyed. Gabe gabe
No, you are not going to quit today. For goodness sake, this is not going to be your last day in the office. Everybody gets dumped Gabe. Can I give you a piece of advice? [Gabe nods] A little cover-up on your Adam's apple will make it appear smaller, and make you look less like a transvestite. [Gabe looks awkward and Michael winks] Michael michael
[walking out the client's room with Andy] That is cold sir! Absolutely cold. You know what? It was a complete waste of my time. DeAngelo deangelo
Uh DeAngelo, I'm, uh. I forgot my bag, so I'll meet you in the car. Andy andy
[grumbles] Okay whatever. DeAngelo deangelo
[walks into the client's office again] Sir, I'd just like to apologize, for that. I could tell you that he has a steel plate in his head, or that he's crazy, but the truth is I think he's just a terrible salesman. And I want you to know, that if you re-up with us, anything you need, day or night, I will be the one to take your call. Andy andy
Keep talking. Client client
[on his phone waiting for Andy, next to their car] Yes. Okay, alright. No, well thank you! Alright, take care. [hangs up] You'll never guess, we did it! DeAngelo deangelo
[laughing] Hey! [they hug] Good job boss! Andy andy
We did it! DeAngelo deangelo
[standing in front of his office, sees that it is three forty five] Okay, everybody come on. Conference room five seconds! Let's go! Hurry up, let's do this! [Dwight runs into the conference room. All others follow] Michael michael
Yes, what is this about? Stanley stanley
What is this meeting about? Michael michael
Mmhmmm. Stanley stanley
Okay, here we are in the conference room. Once again. And I just wanted to call you all here, together, because I have something important. Well there's two things actually. Okay first, I would like a whereabouts on Pam. [Jim looks regretful] And secondly, Phyllis how are those mittens coming? Because I would actually like to bring them home and pack them. I'm leaving for the day at four. Michael michael
They're almost done but my knuckles are swelling a little and- Phyllis phyllis
[cutting her off] Well power through the arthritis Phyllis you can do it! Michael michael
Is that it? Stanley stanley
Umm, hmm? Michael michael
Is that it? Stanley stanley
[the office looks up expectantly] Ummm... Hm... No. [changing his mind] No. There's a special guest that I would like to invite to say one last goodbye. So here he comes, he's coming right in. [walks out and then back in, now using a Vietnamese accent] Oh hi everybody, it's Ping! [the office groans] And I'm here to say goodbye to all you wonderful people! Thank you everybody! You've been so wonderful! [only Kevin is laughing. Stanley tries to leave. Michael hugs him] I ruv you all! I ruv you very much! Michael michael
Hey, can I talk to you for a second? Jim jim
Sure. [Ping accent] Be right out! Michael michael
[brings Michael into his office] So I've been meaning to tell ya, I wanna take you out for lunch. For your last day. Jim jim
[sad] Ohh... Michael michael
What do you think? Tomorrow? Lunch, you and me? Jim jim
[holding back tears] Okay... Michael michael
You're not leaving tomorrow. You're leaving today right? Jim jim
Maybe. Michael michael
Wow, so that's it huh? Just, four o'clock and you are gone for good. Jim jim
Why am I so sad? Am I doing the wrong thing? Michael michael
Absolutely not. It's just that sometimes... goodbyes are a bitch. Jim jim
[pulls out a recorder and speaks softly into it] T-Shirt idea, goodbyes stink. Okay, alright. So. James Halpert. [starts to cry] You started with this company, as a fine young man... Michael michael
You know what I think we should do? I think we should just save the goodbyes for tomorrow. At lunch. Jim jim
Oh, okay. Michael michael
And then tomorrow, I can tell you... what a great boss, you turned out to be. The best boss I ever had. [Jim is holding back tears too] Jim jim
[hears a taxi honking] Oh shoot! That's my cab. Michael michael
Alright. Jim jim
Alright. Michael michael
Listen Michael, I really... I did text Pam, but... Jim jim
I know, it's okay. Just, give her a hug. Alright? Michael michael
[shakes Michael's hand] I will see you, tomorrow at lunch. Jim jim
I am looking forward to lunch. And hearing about what a great boss I am. Michael michael
[chuckles] You got it. Jim jim
Okay... [crosses Jim off his list] Phyllis. Michael michael
Oh no, they're still not done. Phyllis phyllis
No no no, let me see. [picks up the mostly knitted mittens] Oh Phyllis, nice try. I love 'em. [waves goodbye to her with the mittens] [Michael begins walking out the office, he takes one last look at all his friends to see them working, and Jim looking back, teary eyed] Michael michael
[drinking from Michael's World's Best Boss mug] See ya tomorrow boss! Creed creed
Later guys. [leaves the office] Michael michael
Got almost everybody. So... Holly's my family now. [you see video of Michael getting into the cab, and driving off. As the cab leaves, Pam drives in] She's my family. The babies that I make with her, will be my children. The people that you work with, are just... when you get down to it... your very best friends. They say, on your deathbed, you never wish you spent more time at the office. But I will. Gotta be a lot better than a deathbed. [You see Michael getting out and entering the airport, and going through security] I actually don't understand deathbeds. I mean, who would buy that? Michael michael
[putting his shoes back on, talking to the camera crew] Well, I guess this is it. Hey will you guys let me know if this ever airs? Thank you. Alright... Oh! [pulls out his mic from his shirt] This is gonna feel so good, getting this thing off my chest. [he hands them the body mic, when he speaks it is inaudible now] That's what she said! [waves goodbye and walks off to his gate, halfway there Pam comes running up to him and they hug for a while. They say their goodbyes to each other, and Michael walks off for good] Michael michael
[watching Michael's plane take off. Crying and has smeared make up on] No he wasn't sad. He was full of hope. About Colorado, and he was hoping to get an upgrade as an award's member. And he said he was just real excited to get home and see Holly. Pam pam
[all are in the conference room for Michael's party. Michael isn't there. Jim gives the camera a knowing look] Well if he's not gonna make it at least we should go ahead and eat the cake. [Kevin nods] I for one love the corners. [cuts a corner piece, picks it up with his bare hands, and takes a bite] Why'd I just do that? It's not even that good. I don't even want it. I had cake for lunch. [throws the piece in the garbage] No, you know what? I've been good. I deserve this. [grabs a piece from another corner. The office groans] What am I doing? [chucks it into the trashcan] Come on DeAngelo! [DeAngelo tries to lick the cake, everybody yells no] DeAngelo deangelo
[to Jim] Uh oh... [Jim, tearful, nods] Dwight dwight