Good morning, Pam. Andy andy
Oh, welcome back, Andy. Pam pam
Drew. I'm Drew now. Andy andy
Oh. Drew. Sorry. Pam pam
Apology not... accepted. Because it wasn't even necessary in the first place. [laughs] Andy andy
Several weeks ago, Andy Bernard had an incident. [cut to shot of Andy punching a hole in the wall] But after five weeks in Anger Management, I'm back. And I've got a new attitude. And a new name. And... a bunch of new techniques for dealing with the grumpies. Andy andy
Mornin' Jim. Andy andy
Hey, Andy. How are you, man? Jim jim
Good. Drew. Andy andy
What's that? Jim jim
Dr-- You can call me Drew. Andy andy
No, I'm not gonna call you that. Jim jim
Cool. I can't control what you do. I can only control what I do. Andy andy
Andy. Jim jim
Drew. [walks to Dwight] Dwight. How's it goin' man? Andy andy
Yes, I have decided to shun Andy Bernard for the next three years. Which I'm looking forward to. It's an Amish technique. It's like slapping someone with silence. I was shunned from the age of four until my sixth birthday... for not saving the excess oil from a can of tuna. Dwight dwight
Jim, could you please inform Andy Bernard that he is being shunned. Dwight dwight
Andy, Dwight says welcome back, and he could use a hug. Jim jim
Ok, tell him that's not true. Dwight dwight
Dwight says that he actually doesn't know one single fact about bear attacks. Jim jim
You guys... Andy andy
Ok, no. Jim, tell him that bears can climb faster than they can run. Jim! Tell him! Dwight dwight
[half-heartedly] Andy! Nah, that's too far. Jim jim
Damn you. Dwight dwight
Today is Safety Training Day. Toby is leading ours upstairs. Yeauck. But, I am giving everyone a little bit of a treat. We are going to listen in on Darryl's presentation to the warehouse. And if I know Darryl, it gonna be zoppity. Michael michael
Now, this is the forklift. You need-- [Michael rattles it] You need a license to operate this machine. That means the upstairs office workers can't drive it. ... Quiz! Mike. Darryl darryl
Hmm. Michael michael
Should you drive the forklift? Darryl darryl
I can, and I have. Michael michael
No! No no no no no! I said should you. You should not drive it. You should not drive the forklift, you understand? Darryl darryl
You're not allowed to drive the forklift. Lonny lonny
It's not safe, you don't have a license. Darryl darryl
Guys, I'm not the only one who's driven the forklift. [points] Pudge has driven the forklift. Michael michael
Madge. Madge madge
I thought your name was Pudge? Michael michael
No, it's always been Madge. Madge madge
Okay. Um, her. Michael michael
Her. Yes, "her" is qualified to work a dangerous machine. You are not. Okay? Darryl darryl
Ah, fine. Michael michael
Do you understand that? Darryl darryl
Yeeesh. Michael michael
We do safety training every year, or after an accident. ... We've never made it a full year. This particular time, I was reaching for a supply box on the top shelf, when one office worker, who shall remain nameless, kicked the ladder out from under me and yelled... Darryl darryl
[barely keeping his composure] "Hey Darryl, how's it hangin'?!" [laughs] Michael michael
And I fell and busted my ankle. I'm legitimately scared for my workers. Darryl darryl
The baler can flatten a car engine. It can cut off your arm and crush your entire body without skipping a beat. Darryl darryl
Yeah! Dwight dwight
It's on! Andy andy
How many people a year do you think get their arms cut off in a baler? Darryl darryl
Bail'er? I hardly know her. Michael michael
Dammit, Michael. Pay attention, man. Lonny lonny
Anybody wanna take a guess? Anybody? Darryl darryl
Five bucks says it's over 50. Kevin kevin
You really wanna bet? Jim jim
Anybody? Darryl darryl
Ever since March Madness ended, I am so bored. Kevin kevin
How many? Guy guy
Ok, you're on. Jim jim
Ten people, Michael. Ten people. Would you like to be one of them? Darryl darryl
[mouths] Damn... Kevin kevin
[in background] You have to be alert, and calm. And always careful... Darryl darryl
No, don't worry about it. We'll just got double or nothin'. Jim jim
On what? Kevin kevin
I don't know, we'll figure somethin' out. Jim jim
Nice. Kevin kevin
What are you guys talkin' about? Oscar oscar
These are very dangerous machines down here, and the upstairs workers, Michael, should not go anywhere near them. Darryl darryl
Yes, yes. But it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world... if somebody... Michael michael
It would be the worst thing in the world! It would! Very much so. Darryl darryl
What the hell is wrong with this man? Lonny lonny
It's a big red trash compactor! Michael michael
What are you-- Lonny lonny
It's not a trash compactor! It's a baler! Darryl darryl
Don't disrespect the baler! Lonny lonny
Okay, okay! I got it. I got it. ... Only on the rarest of occasions... Michael michael
No do not touch it! Darryl darryl
...would I go near-- Michael michael
There is no occasion for you to go near this stuff, okay? Darryl darryl
Toby now has the floor... and he is going to try not to screw this up, like everything else in his life. Let me rephrase that. I believe that you can do safety training and make it sound just as good as Darryl. Here we go! Michael michael
Ok, um, one thing that you're gonna want to look out for is carpal tunnel syndrome. It's recommended that you take a ten minute break from typing every hour. For your circulation, you're gonna want to get up out of your chairs and uh, and move around about ten minutes every hour. Toby toby
Yes, good. Fine. Like stretching and... Michael michael
Um, yeah. You're computer screen can be a big strain on your eyes, so uh, it's also recommended that you step away for about... about ten minutes every hour. Toby toby
Wow, that is... that time really adds up. That's like... a half an hour, every hour? Michael michael
Take them at the same time. Darryl darryl
Ok, you know what? You're making it sound kind of lame. So, skip ahead to the really dangerous stuff. Like sometimes computers can explode, can they not? Michael michael
No, no. Um, you always want to keep a sweater or cardigan of some sort, in case it gets drafty. Toby toby
What about a long sleeve T? Ryan ryan
Well, that'll work. Toby toby
Long johns? A shaw? Kevin kevin
You know, anything that warms you. Toby toby
Ok, you know what? I think that everybody is going to vomit due to boredom. [to warehouse guys] Sorry, he is very lame. [takes book from Toby] Um, let's see. "Seasonal affective disorder! A depression that includes weight gain, fatigue, irritability, brought on by the low light of winter." Michael michael
Thank God we only had a baler to deal with. Darryl darryl
Yeah, that dim light is a bitch, ain't it? Lonny lonny
Ok guys, you know what? I didn't-- I didn't interrupt when you were having your presentation. Michael michael
Actually, you did. Darryl darryl
Yes. Okay, let's do another one. This is a good one. "A particular concern for office workers is a sedimentary life style, which can contribute--" Michael michael
Sedentary. Toby toby
Yes. "Which can contribute to heart disease." Heart disease kills more people that balers. Michael michael
That's called having a fat butt, Michael. Lonny lonny
Mmmm, no, no, it's... sedentary... Michael michael
Yeah, yeah. That's, that's fat butt disease. That's what you suffer from? Lonny lonny
No. Michael michael
Fat butt disease, Michael? Lonny lonny
Excuse me, sea monster, you weigh like a thousand pounds. Kelly kelly
Yeah? I bet you'd like to swim with this sea monster, wouldn't you? Lonny lonny
Ryan? Kelly kelly
Dude, tell your girl to shut up. Lonny lonny
What?! Kelly kelly
Kelly, you insulted the gentleman. Please apologize. Ryan ryan
Are you kidding me? Kelly kelly
Alright, we outta here. Darryl darryl
Darryl, I did not walk out in the middle of yours. So, I-- Michael michael
Yeah, but ours was real, Michael. Lonny lonny
That's what I've been trying to tell you, Mike. It's serious down there. We do dangerous stuff, man. This is shenanigans, foolishness, Nerf-ball. You live a sweet, little, Nerf-y life. Sittin' on your biscuit. Never havin' to risk it. Darryl darryl
Okay. ... What, Nerf isn't cool anymore? Michael michael
Darryl thinks he is such a man because he works in a warehouse. I worked in a warehouse. Men's Warehouse. I was a greeter. I'd like to see Darryl greet people. Probably make 'em feel like wimps. Not me, I... "Hello, I'm Michael. Welcome to Men's Warehouse. We have a special on khaki pants today." ... This is one example. Michael michael
[Pam is holding a jar of jellybeans] Ten. Kevin kevin
Really, ten? That's your guess? You're a professional accountant. Oscar oscar
There's like ten green ones. Jim jim
Forty-two. Oscar oscar
I'm gonna say fifty. Jim jim
Fifty-one. Karen karen
Oh, don't be that person. Jim jim
That is lame. Kevin kevin
It's a strategy! Karen karen
It's called being smart. Pam pam
Thank you. Karen karen
Oh, geeze. Kevin kevin
I don't know how the whole betting thing started, but it's fun. Pam pam
Ten... Pam pam
Kev's out. Jim jim
Damn it. Kevin kevin
47, 48, 49! Jim wins! Pam pam
Oooh! [Jim claps] Everyone everyone
That is not fair. He has spent hours up here at reception with you. Hours and hours. Kevin kevin
Okay, okay. Jim jim
No, constantly. Like, for years. Kevin kevin
Okay. Jim jim
Pam, depression is as scary as a baler, right? Michael michael
I don't understand the question. Pam pam
Working in an office can lead to depression. Which can lead to suicide. I mean this is really serious stuff. Michael michael
Yeah... Pam pam
I-- I-- Nobody commits suicide because they work with a baler, and yet those guys are makin' fun of me, calling me a Nerf, that... Michael michael
It's really hard to demonstrate depression. Their safety training had visuals. Pam pam
Yeah... you are... ah, so right. They had visual aids. And all we had were the facts. You don't go to the science museum and get handed a pamphlet on electricity. You go to the science museum and you put your hand on a metal ball, your hair sticks up straight... and you know science. Michael michael
So, you're okay? Pam pam
Indubitably. Michael michael
They use props. They use visual aids, and they just made us look like dopes. Michael michael
Idiots! God, what are we gonna do!? Dwight dwight
I don't know, I don't know. Because you know what our killer is? Depression-- Michael michael
Wolves. Dwight dwight
Nn-- Depression. Michael michael
Visual aids. Dwight dwight
Yes. Michael michael
A quilt. Depression quilt? Dwight dwight
No time to sew a quilt. ... I got it. Give me the number for the Giant Big Box Toy Store. Michael michael
You may be asking yourself, "What am I doing on a trampoline?" Well, I thought I'd bounce here for a while, relieve some stress, and then move on with my day. Not! Here's the plan. Dwight, is going to gather all of the office workers and all of the warehouse guys, we're going to have another safety seminar. Only this time, where's Michael? Oh my God! He is on the roof! Now I have got their attention. I... tell them, about the cold hard facts of depression. And then I say, "Hey! You ever seen a suicide?" And I jump. And they freak out. And they get to see... the dangers of depression with their own eyes. Nice side note: Michael michael
So then the next movie moves to the top of the queue. So number five becomes number four, number six becomes number five, [Ryan checks his watch]number three becomes number two, etc, etc. And let's just say that I just sent back Love Actually, which was awesome. [Karen lays money down on the desk next to Ryan] And they sent me Uptown Girls, which is also awesome. But guess what, now I want to see love actually again, [Phyllis throws her money down] but it's at the bottom of the que! Oh no, what do I do!? [Creed throws his money down] What I do, is this. I go online, I go click, click, click. And I change the order of the que, so that I can see Love Actually [Pam throws her money down] as soon as I want to. It's so easy, Ryan. Do you really not know how Netflix works? [Jim throws his money down] Kelly kelly
I guess I forgot. [kisses Kelly, gathers up all the money] Ryan ryan
You're such a ditz. Kelly kelly
Ryan, well done. Two minutes, forty-two seconds. Additionally, Pam, you win ten because she said "awesome" 12 times, and Jim, you win five because she mentioned six romantic comedies. Kevin kevin
[on the roof] Okay, let's do this thing! I'll go summon the troops! Dwight dwight
Maybe we should test it first. Letterman-style. Throw a TV over, or... Michael michael
We measured it once... Dwight dwight
Go buy some watermelons. Michael michael
Seedless? Dwight dwight
Just... Michael michael
[Creed takes a bite of an apple] Creed is eating an apple. I found a potato. Toby toby
Hey Creed. Pam pam
Hey! Creed creed
Hey. Pam pam
Hello. [Jim replaces Creed's apple with a potato][Creed takes a bite of the potato] Creed creed
Yes! Pam pam
Here you go. [hands money] Kevin kevin
Nice. Toby toby
I don't know this place as well as I thought I did. I'm getting cleaned out. Karen karen
Ready? Dwight dwight
Let's do it! Drop that sucker. Michael michael
[drops watermelon, watermelon bounces off trampoline, onto a car, bursts, car alarm sounds] Dwight dwight
BINGO! WHOA WHOA WHOA! Oh... crap. Deactivate the car alarm. Clean up the mess. Michael michael
Okay. Dwight dwight
Find out whose car that is. If it's Stanley's, call the offices of James P. Albini, see if he handles hate crimes. Michael michael
Got it. Dwight dwight
Also, take apart the trampoline, stick it in the baler. Michael michael
We're not allowed to use the baler. Dwight dwight
Have Pa-adge do it, or... the sea monster. Michael michael
I'm on it! Dwight dwight
I'm temporarily lifting the shun. Dwight dwight
Thank you. Andy andy
It means nothing. I need you to do something for me. Dwight dwight
Anything. Andy andy
Okay, calm down. I need you to acquire an inflatable house, and/or castle. Dwight dwight
You mean a moon bounce. Andy andy
What do you think? You've got an hour. Dwight dwight
I'm gonna need... I'm gonna need petty cash. Andy andy
Shunning resumed. Dwight dwight
Do you, do you want a drawbridge? Andy andy
Un-shun. Yeah that sounds good. Re-shun. Dwight dwight
Oh yeah, this is much better. Safer. Excellent decision. Dwight dwight
Yes, thank you for seeing that. Michael michael
When you land, try and land like an eight year-old. These bouncy castles are not designed for adults. Dwight dwight
I don't know if I wanna do this. Michael michael
Do you wanna do another test? I got plenty of watermelons in my trunk! Dwight dwight
No. No more. The tests are going terrible. If we keep doing it, we're not gonna want to jump. This is about doing, not thinking. Michael michael
That's right! Doing! Totally doing! It's rock n' roll! Dwight dwight
Rock n' roll! Michael michael
Yeah! Dwight dwight
That's right! I am not thinking. Michael michael
[imitating the sound and playing an air guitar] Near near near near near! Dwight dwight
Yes! Yeah! Michael michael
[singing] Michael is awesome! Jumpin' off the roof! Dwight dwight
Woo! Michael michael
[singing] Bouncin' on the bouncy bounce! Show 'em who's boss! Dwight dwight
Woo! Michael michael
[singing] Rip a hole in the suuuuuuun! Dwight dwight
I am ready to do this! I am ready to make a point! [Dwight continues air guitar] Michael michael
[out of breath] Guys! Listen up! Michael is up on the roof, and acting strange! Dwight dwight
Whoa! What's the situation? Andy andy
[hesitates] Un-shun. I think he's suffering from depression. Re-shun. Dwight dwight
Ok, when's the shunning thing gonna end? Andy andy
Un-shun. Never. Re-shun. I think he wants you all to come out to the parking lot and watch him die! Dwight dwight
Is it nice outside? Stanley stanley
It's gorgeous. Let's go! Dwight dwight
Do I need my jacket? Stanley stanley
No really, it's, it's very nice. Come on! Dwight dwight
Will I be too warm in a long sleeve T? Ryan ryan
Everybody's gonna be fine in exactly what they're wearing, let's go! Let's go! Dwight dwight
[outside] Come on, hurry up you guys! Dwight dwight
[on the roof] My life! Oh, my life... Michael michael
[on megaphone] Michael, what's wrong?! Dwight dwight
Everything's wrong. The stress of my modern office, has caused me to go into a depression. Michael michael
Depression? Isn't that just a fancy word for feeling bummed out? Dwight dwight
Dwight, you ignorant slut. Depression is a very serious illness. Over 32 thousand people commit suicide every year! According to a 2004 study! Michael michael
Is that the last year the data was available? Dwight dwight
Yes! My head is in such pain! And turmoil! Michael michael
Don't do anything rash! Dwight dwight
Wait, where are the warehouse guys? Michael michael
I didn't... [Dwight runs up to the side of the building] I didn't think you needed them for this part. Dwight dwight
Okay... that's... Michael michael
you said to just... Dwight dwight
That's the whole point, dummy. Michael michael
Okay, I'm on it! Dwight dwight
Okay. Michael michael
Attention blue collar workers! Dwight dwight
What are the odds that this is in any way real? Pam pam
I'd say like... 10,000 to 1? Jim jim
Okay, I'd like ten bucks on those odds. Kevin kevin
If someone gives you 10,000 to 1 on anything, you take it. If John Mellencamp ever wins an Oscar, I am going to be a very rich dude. Kevin kevin
Michael's up on the roof and he's acting strange! Dwight dwight
Oooooh, my life! Michael michael
Michael! What's wrong? Dwight dwight
Everything is wrong, Dwight. The stress of my modern office, has made me depressed. Michael michael
Depressed? Isn't that just a fancy word for feeling bummed out? Dwight dwight
Dwight, you ignorant slut. Michael michael
Well, you know, the first performance was a little off. But I really think they hit their stride, in the second show. Um, might even bring my parents tomorrow, to the matinee. Jim jim
And that is why, I am going to jump off this roof! Michael michael
Oh, excuse me. It's my... favorite part. Jim jim
This is just offensive. Angela angela
At least we're outside. Ryan ryan
[zipping up his pants] Hey, check it out, there's a... there's a castle over there. Creed creed
Oh my God, there is a castle. Jim jim
No, there's nothing to see over there, people! There's nothing to see. ...They found the castle, Michael. Dwight dwight
Damn it. Michael michael
Oh... God. Oh my God, he's gonna jump. Pam pam
Oh. He's going to kill himself, pretending to kill himself. Jim jim
Yeah... Pam pam
Hey uh, Michael. Don't jump on the bouncy castle. You can't do that, because you're going to get horribly, horribly injured. Jim jim
Hey Michael! I have a present for you, but you have to come down and get it. Pam pam
What is it? Michael michael
Come down and... open it and you'll see. Pam pam
Dwight, find out what the present is. Michael michael
Okay, uh... I don't see anything. She might be bluffing. Dwight dwight
Dwight... Jim jim
Dwight, what are you-- Pam pam
Oh... It's uh, a Repliee Q1 Expo female robot, they're only available in Japan. Dwight dwight
Dwight, you are such a liar. Pam, really, what is it? Michael michael
Mike, this is the opposite of safety. You jump, you're gonna serious hurt yourself. Darryl darryl
You told me, that I lead a... cushy, wimpy, Nerf life. Michael michael
Yeah, but I never said you had nothing to live for. Darryl darryl
What do I have to live for? Michael michael
A lot... of things. Uh, you, uh... What about Jan? Lovely, lovely, lovely Jan, man. It's goin' good, right? Darryl darryl
It's complicated with Jan. And I don't know where I stand, or what I want. The sex isn't nearly as good as it used to be. Michael michael
Mike, you're a very brave man. I mean, it takes courage just to be you. To get out of bed every single day, knowing full well, you gotta be you. Darryl darryl
Do you really mean that? Michael michael
I couldn't do it. I-- I ain't that strong. And I ain't that brave. Darryl darryl
I'm braver than you? Michael michael
Way braver! You Braveheart, man. Darryl darryl
I Braveheart. I am. Michael michael
Come down, okay? Darryl darryl
Okay. Pam, I'm coming down to get my present. Michael michael
An office... is as safe as the people in it. And sometimes those people can drive you to do crazy things to show the dangers of the office. That's the danger I found myself in today. I saved a life. My own. Am I a hero? I really can't say. But, yes. Michael michael
When people think of Andy, they think of hate and anger. When people think of Drew, they think of baked goods. Andy andy
Oh my God, these cookies have no flavor. How is that possible? Kelly kelly
They are the worst. Who's this Drew chick? Kevin kevin
Drew isn't a girl... She's Andy. Phyllis phyllis
Oh no, nobody likes my cookies. I'm so angry, argh I want to hit something. [laughs] Totally kidin' guys. Andy andy
Little device I learned to diffuse tension, be the first to make fun of yourself, because if they make fun of you before you do... Then you might lose your mind. Andy andy
[pours the last of the coffee into his mug] Kevin kevin
Ahhh... Is that the last of it? Andy andy
I'm sorry. Kevin kevin
It's OK. I can't always have what I want, but I can always want what I have. Andy andy
Well, would you like a cup of no coffee? 'Cause that's what we have. Kevin kevin
Is it fresh? [winks] Andy andy
Are you going to beat me up? Kevin kevin
Umm... [draws back arm] No. [laughs] Andy andy
People don't need to be afraid of me. I can't achieve anger any more, and I have a new car. Toyota Prius, because Andy didn't care about fuel efficiency, but Drew has seen "An Inconvenient Truth". Nearly twice. Andy andy
[walks around Andy's new car keying it] Angela angela
OK, come on everybody, go time. Pam let's go. Michael michael
I thought I'd stay and answer the phones. Pam pam
Don't worry Pam, you will be answering phones for the rest of your life... Your long lovely life. [whispers to camera] saved it. Michael michael
Here we go. Michael michael
Come on. Dwight dwight
Field Trip. Michael michael
Step lively. Single file everybody. Dwight dwight
Like we're going to the science museum. Michael michael
Let's single... Dwight dwight
Learn by touching. Michael michael
Single... OK. Dwight dwight
I've been told that I'm a tactile learner. Michael michael
Buddy system, everyone buddy up, find a buddy. Dwight dwight
You should work out Ryan, you would look so hot. Kelly kelly
Totally, we should both work out. Ryan ryan
Screw you. Kelly kelly
Kelly, Ryan looks great. You should be thankful that you... Michael michael
Sir, could you please, please focus on Darryl? Larry larry
I... Michael michael
Try. Larry larry
Summing up. Darryl darryl
Sum it up Darryl, sum it up. Michael michael
We got beat today, Dwight. Michael michael
[sighs] Dwight dwight
But it was not a fair fight. Michael michael
No it was not. Remind me again, what was the fight exactly, who was it between, and what was the outcome? Dwight dwight
It was the warehouse guys... Michael michael
Right. Dwight dwight
... Dwight, they embarrassed us... Michael michael
Argh! Dwight dwight
... because they had a much scarier safety presentation. Michael michael
Ghaaa! Dwight dwight
You know what's funny? Robin Williams. [sighs] When a cat gets stuck in a washing machine. City Slickers. Talking like Borat. You know what's not funny? Safety, or making fun of the person trying to talk about safety. [in Borat voice] Not nice. I must show people how dangerous office can be. High five... Now that's funny. Michael michael
How do you make depression sexy? How do you... How do you get people interested in depression? That is the conon... the conun... the conumbery Michael michael
Those warehouse guys, think that we are all flabby, middle management, nerf balls. Well I'm going to show them that we have nerfs of steel. [winks] Michael michael
[Michael, Andy, and Dwight are standing around a trampoline] You know guys, I recently learned some pretty cool stuff about the difference between feeling something and... acting on that thing. Andy andy
Can you tell Andy to focus on the springs? Please. Dwight dwight
Yeah, Drew. Michael michael
Yes bosses. Andy andy
You know Drew, why don't you go inside. Dwight come here. Where should we put this? Michael michael
OK, ahh, turn around, and do a broad jump for me on go. Ready... Go! One Mississ... OK, you went that far on one Mississ. Ippi would take you to here. This trajectory times the propulsion from your quadriceps would be about three Mississippi, maybe three and a quarter. So one Mississ... correct... ippi, two Mississippi, three Mississippi... e. Right here. Dwight dwight
OK, good. Thank you. Wanna take our time, do this right. Michael michael
[phone rings] Hello? Hi Bob Vance. [laughs] Phyllis phyllis
That's three times in ten minutes. Karen karen
Where's my five dollars? Stanley stanley
You are my little teddy bear. I wantcha. Phyllis phyllis
I always knew my co-workers were annoying. I never realized I could profit from it. Go ahead Bob Vance, call Phyllis, all day. Stanley stanley
[Michael is up on the roof of the building] Michael, go ahead, we're listening. Andy andy
I'm going to wait. I don't want to say this twice, it's too painful and I'm too depressed. Michael michael
[talking through bullhorn] Michael, you can not fly, you can not, I've seen this too many times. Creed creed
Give me that thing, I want to try. Kelly kelly
Oh, you know what we should probably preserve the batteries. Jim jim
I was just going to say that [yells toward Michael] you have a cute butt. Oh my God I did not just say that, did I just say that? Oh my God I'm so adorable. Kelly kelly
I know the timings bad, but I hate to be a nudge, but there's stuff that he has to sign that needs to be mailed by four. Angela angela
OK, if he's not down by four, I'll get the papers up to him. Dwight dwight
OK, it's three forty eight. Angela angela
OK, Ryan you know what? You can do this. Jim jim
Oh, no, I have no training in this sort of thing. Ryan ryan
Come on. Jim jim
Don't play dumb, you know damn well what we talking about. Stanley stanley
Come on. He'll listen to you. Jim jim
Come on Ryan. Everyone everyone
Let's do it. Angela angela
Come on pretty boy. Dwight dwight
Michael, you have always taken a great interest in my career. Ryan ryan
I will miss you the most Ryan. Michael michael
Oh, what is your deal man!? Seriously I don't get it. Ryan ryan
Let me borrow that chief. Michael, you don't have to prove anything to anyone but yourself. So don't jump just to prove anything to us. OK? That said, if you need to prove something to yourself, you should jump. Andy andy
Oh! Jim jim
Up to you. Andy andy
No no no! Jim jim
If you do jump, I want you to reach for the sky. Andy andy
Hey! Pam pam
OK. careful, thanks. [takes bullhorn from Andy] Jim jim
Grab a comet and kiss the moon! Kiss it! Andy andy
See this is why you always take ten thousand to one. You never know. Kevin kevin
You own a convertible. Come on man that's, that's hot. Women love that stuff right? Darryl darryl
It's only leased, and it's got rust damage, he'll never get his deposit back. Dwight dwight
Coal miners, crab fishermen, Dog the bounty hunter, all dangerous jobs. But also upper middle management. [takes deep breath] Wow! I could have fallen off a roof today... And you don't worry about falling off a roof when you work on a crab boat... And there are no roofs in coal mines. Michael michael
[in parking lot] Goodnight Stanley. [sees his car is keyed, just nods his head] Andy andy