It is Friday morning and it is another beautiful day in Scranton, Pennsylvania. [sees man in a turban outside] Oh my God. Ohhh. [dials phone number] Pick up, pick up, pick up, pick up. Oh, we have a serious problem here. [goes out onto office floor] Alright everybody, lock the doors, turn off the lights. Pretend you're not here. Michael michael Are we in danger? Jim jim There's no time to think about if this is real. Just, shh, everybody. [knock at the front door] Michael michael Michael, should I call the... [Michael waves his hands] What? Kevin kevin The IT tech guy and me did not get off to a great start. Michael michael Yeah, I tried to install it myself, but, uh, you guys have these things so password-protected... Michael michael That just means you have to enter your password. Sadiq sadiq Oh... Michael michael What's your password, Michael? Sadiq sadiq Oh, umm... [looks at Post-It on computer] Michael michael Oh, it's 1-2-3. Sadiq sadiq Yes. Michael michael Mi- Dwight dwight AH! Guh-oood. Michael michael Sorry. Dwight dwight Please don't do that. Michael michael Ok, I'm sorry. What is going on in there? Why is he here? What are you doing? Dwight dwight I can't tell you. Michael michael You have to tell me. Dwight dwight I don't have to tell you anything. Michael michael Look, Michael, I know you don't want to have to think about this, but if something were to happen to you, God forbid, then I would need to know in order to take over. Dwight dwight Dwight, nothing is going to happen to me, ok? I'm in the best shape of my life. Look at this. [flexes his arms] Brrr! That's strong! Michael michael Yeah, but that doesn't matter, you could get a brain aneurysm- Dwight dwight I'm not going get a brain- Michael michael Or get hit by a car- Dwight dwight Stop it. Michael michael Or a bus or a train. Get poisoned, fall in a well, step on a mine, choke. Dwight dwight Uh, oh, ok; if I step on a mine in Scranton, Pennsylvania, and die, you can have my job, ok? Why don't you just go... away? Michael michael There are certain things a boss does not share with his employees. His salary, that would depress them. His bed, it-- And I am not going to tell them that I'll be reading their e-mails. Michael michael So how do you search? Michael michael By keyword phrase. Sadiq sadiq Try "profits". No! Try "Michael Scott". "Michael" "boss" and "funny". [Sadiq (IT guy) types; result pops up] Oh my God, wow! [chuckles] E-mail from Stanley. Stanley, Terribly nice guy. [reads e-mail] "Sorry I didn't write back sooner; I can't go to the game tonight because my boss Michael is an ass and making me stay late." Well, Stanley's an ass. Not one of our harder workers. Michael michael Hey, what's the deal, Michael? Why are you spying on our computers? Oscar oscar Oh, no, everybody; Oscar's gone crazy! What other ghost stories do you have for us? That I'm a robot? [robot voice] I will destroy everything in my path- Michael michael Actually, it's just- Oscar oscar Beep! Bop! Michael michael Ok... Oscar oscar Bommmm. Bop! Onk onk. [Tin Man voice] Oil can. Oil can. Michael michael Tin Man. Actually we just a got a memo from IT saying you're doing e-mail surveillance. Oscar oscar Oh, what? No. That defeats the whole purpose. Michael michael So it's true? You have access to our e-mails? Dwight dwight You know what the problem is? Michael michael I think I do. Stanley stanley The problem is that when people hear the term "big brother", they immediately think it's scary or bad, but I don't. I think, wow, I love my big brother. Michael michael I gotta erase a lotta stuff. A lot of stuff. Kevin kevin Oh hey, just so ya know, if you have a lot of sensitive e-mails, they need to be deleted immediately. Dwight dwight I know. Angela angela Good. [Pam overhears] Dwight dwight [whispers to Jim] Hey. Something just happened. Dwight just told Angela that she has to deleted all of her sensitive e-mails immediately. Pam pam What? Jim jim I know! Pam pam Hmm... Jim jim Do you think that they're like- Pam pam No. Jim jim No, right, no, no. Pam pam [humming] Jim jim Uhhh, ew, ew, ew... Maybe? Pam pam It's like squishing a spider under a book. It's gonna be really gross but I have to look and make sure that it's really dead. Sooo... [to camera guys] If you guys see anything... ? Pam pam Hey, Dwight, um, my friend is kinda into these two girls that he works with. Pam pam Nice. Dwight dwight One is tall and brunette, and the other one is short, and blonde, and perky, and kinda judgmental. Who do you think he should choose? Pam pam Does he have access to their medical records? Dwight dwight Ummmm... Pam pam I think one of the greatest things about modern America is the computerization of medical records. As a volunteer sheriff, I can look up anyone's psychiatric records or surgical histories. Yeast infections. There are a huge number of yeast infections in this county. Probably because we are down river from that old bread factory. Dwight dwight Meredith has an E-vite from Jim. Barbeque at Jim's tonight. Tonight? Wonder where my e-vitation is. Click on guest list. Angela, Stanley, Oscar, Meredith, Phyllis, Kevin, Creed. Must be... .[scrolls down list] No. Michael michael Hey, Angela- Pam pam Hi. Angela angela How's it going? Pam pam It's ok. Angela angela Listen, are you bringing anyone to Jim's party tonight? Pam pam No. Are we supposed to? Angela angela No. I mean, I don't know, I don't think so. Pam pam Hmm... [Pam reaches towards vending machine] Excuse me. Angela angela Oh. Pam pam There's always a distance between a boss and the employees. It is just nature's rule. It's intimidation mostly, it's the awareness that they are not me. I do think that I am very approachable, as one of the guys. But maybe I need to be even approachabler. Michael michael That's pretty young. Kevin kevin Yeah. Pam pam [to Michael] Are you gonna eat with us? Kevin kevin Of course. Hangin' with my crew, crew that I am one of. Hangin' with my Cup of Noodles. This is a meal in a cup. Michael michael Uh hum. Jim jim Hot, tasty. Reminds me of college. Lived on this stuff. Brain food. Mmmm... You know what I really, really miss about college? The parties. Everybody'd go. The athletes, the, the nerds, professors. Michael michael The professors would go to the parties? Pam pam Yeah! They were the most fun. We always invited them. Michael michael It's true. I'm having a party. I've got three cases of imported beer, a karaoke machine, and I didn't invite Michael. So three ingredients for a great party. And it's nothing personal, I just think that if he were there, people wouldn't be able to relax, and you know, have fun, and my roommate wants to meet everybody. Because I'm pretty sure he thinks that I'm making Dwight up. [sighs] He is very real. Jim jim [to cameraman] What? [looks at Dwight eating a Baby Ruth] Ohhhh... Yes! Thank you! Pam pam Question: Dwight dwight So, Dwight thinks that tonight is a surprise party for Michael. Jim jim Really? That's great. Pam pam I know. Jim jim Maybe we can get him to hide and wait somewhere. Pam pam [laughs] Oh man. Oh, you know what, speaking of which, I was just trying to get a handle on, you know, numbers for food and stuff. So do you think that Roy's gonna come, or... Jim jim Oh, no, he can't make it. Pam pam Oh, ok, cool. Jim jim Hey there. Michael michael Hey. Jim jim Almost quittin' time. Michael michael Yup, it's, uh, four o'clock. Jim jim One more hour. Take care of anything you forgot to do. Hey, you know, I don't know if you have any plans tonight, but if ya don't, we could hang out. Michael michael Oh, um... .I can't. Jim jim You have plans. Michael michael Uh hmm, definitely. Jim jim I do, too. I do, too. Michael michael You do? Jim jim I do, yeah. Big plans. Michael michael Because you said "do you wanna hang out"- Jim jim Tonight, I can't do it tonight, no. Improv class, I have improv class, hanging out with my improv buds- Michael michael Really? Jim jim Yeah. Michael michael Aw, that sounds like a lot of fun. Jim jim It's the best. It's the best. I would not miss it for the world. But if something else came up, I would definitely not go. Michael michael Improv sounds great. Jim jim It is. Ok. Michael michael Alright. Jim jim [someone coughs] What? Michael michael I think Stanley just coughed. Jim jim Hey, Pam. Do you need me to walk to your vehicular transport? Michael michael No thanks. Pam pam Alright. Oscar, got big plans tonight with- Michael michael I'm on a call. Oscar oscar Kevin, big man, big man, what are you doing tonight? Where are you off to? Michael michael My brother is in town and we are going to see the Alaska Film Festival at the Scien- Kevin kevin Ok, alright. Michael michael Oh. Kevin kevin Hey, Angela, rushy, rushy. Where you rushin' off to? Michael michael I'm just leaving for the day. Angela angela Yeah, well duh. Where ya headed? Michael michael Charity. Bake drive. Angela angela Liar! Michael michael No! Angela angela You are a liar. Michael michael No, I'm not. Angela angela Dwight, oh ho, Dwight, Dwight, my loyal compadre. You and I are hangin' tonight. The two of us. We are celebrating our freedom and our manhood. You know what? Why don't we watch that show that you've been wanting to watch, that stupid Battleship Galaxy. Michael michael Battlestar Galatica. Dwight dwight That's, whatever stupid show you want- Michael michael I can't- Dwight dwight To watch tonight Michael michael Tonight. Dwight dwight We're watching it. Michael michael Unfortunately, I've got plans. I have to go to practice. Soccer practice. Dwight dwight I didn't know you played soccer, Dwight. Michael michael Clarinet. Dwight dwight You, too, Dwight? Michael michael Have fun tonight! Whatever it is that you're doing, and I'll see you Monday. [to the camera] He has no idea! Dwight dwight Quick announcement everybody, if I could have everybody's attention. We do have wine in the kitchen, and, uh, there is beer available on the porch and despite what you might think, it's not all for Meredith and Kelly, so please enjoy. Jim jim Jim! You really think this is a good idea, huh? A hide-a-key rock? Dwight dwight Hey, you must be Dwight! Mark mark You don't work with us. Dwight dwight That's because Mark's my roommate. Jim jim Hey, I love the Birkenstocks. Mark mark Thanks. Yeah, I always keep an extra set in the car, for special occasions. Jim, come here. Dwight dwight Uh hmm. Jim jim When is the guest of honor coming? Dwight dwight Oh, uh, later-ish. Jim jim He's gonna love it! Dwight dwight Great. [to a group of guests] Just wanna let you guys know that we will be taking the tour like I promised- Jim jim Hey. Pam pam Hey! Just in time! You wanna go on the group tour? We were just about to leave. Jim jim Definitely. Pam pam Well, the group tour is now leaving, then. Ladies and gentlemen, just a few things that we are gonna be pointing out to you today, you will be able to see both bedrooms and, uh, if we're lucky, maybe get a chance to peek into the bathroom, who knows. I have to remind you that flash photography is prohibited and as much as you can, please refrain from touching things. I know you might want to. Jim jim Hey, is Katy coming? Ryan ryan Uh, actually, I haven't talked to her in a while. Jim jim Huh, is it ok if I call her? Ryan ryan We can talk about that later. Jim jim Ok, let's get right into it. I need two people for the first scene. Improv Teacher improv-teacher [In Horshack voice from 'Welcome Back, Kotter'] Ooo Ooo Ooo Ooo, Mr. Cart-air, Mr. Cart-air. Michael michael Ok, Michael. And... anybody? How about Mary-Beth? Come on. Ok, so you start us off Mary-Beth. Improv Teacher improv-teacher Great. [skips] La la la la la laaa... Mary-Beth mary-beth [fake kicks in door] Boom! Detective Michael Scarn. I'm with the FBI. Michael michael Think about this; what is the most exciting thing that can happen, on TV, or in movies, or in real life? Somebody has a gun. [gasps] That's why I always start with a gun, because you can't top it, you just can't. Michael michael I'm supposed to meet my doctor here? Have ya seen him? He's a very angry midget. Girl acting Pregnant girl-acting-pregnant Boom! Freeze! Michael Scoon, FBI. You know what you did. Boom! Boom! Boom! [shoots at Pregnant Girl and another actor] Yeah, you thought that you could get away with your little ruse, didn't you? Didn't ya!? Well, you didn't, because I know where ya hid the diamonds. I been on to you and your little friends for weeks. [another actor steps in] Boom! Boom! Boom! Michael michael I'm not even in the scene! Actor actor Again!? Actress actress Boom! Boom! Michael michael Stop, stop, ok, stop. Improv Teacher improv-teacher Boom! Boom! Michael michael You shot me, great. Now stop. Improv Teacher improv-teacher Why Michael michael You can't just shoot everyone in the scene. Improv Teacher improv-teacher Well, if you hadn't stopped the scene, you would have seen where it was going. Michael michael Ok, what about the scene they set up? Improv Teacher improv-teacher Boring. Michael michael No, it wasn't. No more guns. Improv Teacher improv-teacher I could of- Michael michael No. No. Michael, I want you to give me all the guns you have. Improv Teacher improv-teacher Ok. Michael michael Just, I want you to get rid of all your guns and give them to me. Great. Improv Teacher improv-teacher Yehhhehh. Michael michael Yeeehh, ok. Improv Teacher improv-teacher Jim's bedroom. Pam pam See, I knew we lost somebody on the tour. It's- Jim jim Cool... This is your desk. Pam pam This is my desk. Jim jim Your home office? Pam pam My home office, this is it. Jim jim Down. You have to sit down so I can get the full effect. Pam pam Ok, sure. Will do. Jim jim Ok, wait, so that would make me [walks to side of room] like right here. Pam pam Yeah, that... Yep, that feels about right. Jim jim And Dwight would be like- Pam pam You know what? Let's just leave that image out of it, because this is a happy place. Happy thoughts, Pam. Happy thoughts. Jim jim Umm, [gasps] yearbook! Pam pam Yeah, you don't have to, ummm. Alright, yes, that's not gonna be awkward at all. Jim jim [finds Jim's picture] Ooooohhh no! Pam pam Oh yeah. Jim jim You were so dorky! Pam pam Thank you. Jim jim Freeze! Improv Teacher improv-teacher I'm in. Michael michael You wanna go over the rules one more time? Improv Teacher improv-teacher No, no, no. I'm looking in my wallet for money so you can tell me my fortune. Michael michael I promise it's worthit . Ooo, I can see you walking out of here and you're thrilled with your reading. Bill bill What are you... [whispers to Bill] Michael michael Michael, what did you tell him? Improv Teacher improv-teacher Nothing. Michael michael Then why are his hands up? Bill? Improv Teacher improv-teacher He told me he couldn't show it to me, but he has a gun. Bill bill Ok, let's call it a day. Nice job, Bill. Improv Teacher improv-teacher Good, it's good. Good work, everybody. Michael michael Angela, burger? Dog? Havin' fun? Jim jim I got sap on me. Angela angela Chicken, hot dog, burger. Jim jim I'm a vegetarian. Angela angela There is soda inside. Jim jim Guh. Angela angela I didn't think the premium laser color copy batch would sell as well as it did. Stanley stanley Yeah, it surprised us all. I'll tell you why. Because when they-- Oscar oscar I'm sorry guys; can we please not talk about paper? There's gotta be something else we can talk about. Kelly kelly I think it's alright. Jesus drank wine. [Pam overhears] Angela angela Hey Phyllis, come here for a second. Pam pam Sure. Phyllis phyllis Have you heard anything about any secret office romances? Pam pam You tell me. Well, you do mean you and Jim right? Oh God. I am so sorry, I thought, you guys hang out all the time and you're talking all the time. I'm sorry! Phyllis phyllis That's ok. It's ok. Pam pam [smacks Ryan's hand] Not so fast... Fire Guy. Kevin kevin How do I get to Bernie's Tavern from here? Mary-Beth mary-beth Oh, don't worry. We're all gonna carpool. Bill bill So Bernie's, huh? We're all going to Bernie's? [to camera] Go to Bernie's? Michael michael Oh sorry, we're not going as a group, it's just a private friend who just happens to know all of us from different ways is throwing a private birthday thing. Bill bill Right, right, right. Well guys, I'd love to go to Bernie's with you, but, you know, I have an office party. A big office party I need to go to, so... Can't get out of it. Michael michael Ok. Bill bill Ok, see you later. Nice job, Bill. Not. Michael michael [singing] Here I go again on my own. Going down the only road I've ever known... Phyllis phyllis Oh by the way how's your side project going? Jim jim Oh, yeah I gave that up. Pam pam Really? Jim jim Yeah, it turns out I was, um, just grasping at straws. Pam pam Just because two people are hanging out, it doesn't mean that they're together, you know? Like people can just be friends. And I think that it was really unfair to think that there was anything else going on. Pam pam [singing] Just turn around now, cause you're not welcome anymore. Kevin kevin Surprise! [laughs] Everybody! Dwight dwight Dwight... Phyllis phyllis Wow! Who opened the morgue for this thing? I'm just driving by, thought I'd drop in. [to Jim] There's some wine. I would love a glass, if you're gonna open it. Here ya go Temp, take my jacket! [sees Sadiq] Oh, come on! That guy? He is a good guy, not a terrorist. Karaoke, I love it! I am a karaoke fiend. I call dibs. I got next, I got next up. Come on, let's get this party started, ha! Ok? Where's that wine? Michael michael Ok, yeah, this is a duet, so, need somebody else, Pam? You wanna come up and sing this one? Need somebody else. Takers, please. [singing] Baby when I met you there was peace unknown. Kelly? Tried to get you with a fine tooth comb. I was soft inside, there was something goin' on. This part goes to the, uh, girl. You do something to me that I can't explain. Hold me closer and I feel no pain. In every beat of my heart, we got something goin' on. Tender love is blind-- Michael michael [singing] It requires a dedication, all this love we feel needs no conversation. Divided, together, uh huh. Making love with each other, uh huh. {Michael} and {Jim} michael jim We're making love! Michael michael [singing] Islands in the stream, that is what we are, no one in between, how can we be wrong? Sail away with me... {Michael} and {Jim} michael jim Talk! Just talk! Michael michael I am- Mary-Beth mary-beth Shut up! Michael michael Funny story: Michael michael [Oscar shakes his leg] You're going to have to stop that. [Oscar moves over] I can still feel it. Angela angela Do you have a question or something? Sadiq sadiq Um... Michael michael About my turban, maybe? Sadiq sadiq Nope, nope. I actually wear a turban sometimes. Wanna see it? Michael michael Yeah. Sadiq sadiq Got it right here. [pulls out Karnak turban] Michael michael Why do you have that? Sadiq sadiq Comedy; it's funny. It's Johnny Carson, Karnak. It's, um, put it back. Huhhhh, did you have Johnny Carson in your land? Michael michael In Pittsburgh? Yeah, but I never really watched him. Sadiq sadiq Oh. You were forbidden. Michael michael No, I'm much younger than you. I watched Conan. Sadiq sadiq Alright, I'm gonna, uhh, get a cup of coffee. Do you want some coffee er- Michael michael No. Sadiq sadiq Or some tea or hummus or something? Michael michael No, thank you. Sadiq sadiq Oh, this isn't good. Phyllis phyllis It's fine. Stanley stanley You don't even know what I'm talking about. Phyllis phyllis Should have done this a long time ago. Tons of personal e-mails, huge time wasters. Uh, uh huh. Wow, like Kevin, rating the best bars in Scranton? Poor Richard's number seven? Idiot. Stupid load. [phone rings] Yeah. Michael michael Hey, Michael, accounting needs your approval on- Pam pam Yeah, I'm busy right now. [hangs up] Michael michael Here's a helpful suggestion for Jim. Jim, instead of e-mailing Amazon, to try and get that CD that you didn't receive, I suggest that you go to Visa and tell them to cancel the charge. Michael michael Yeah, definitely didn't need help with that, but, yeah. Jim jim It's seems like ya did though- Michael michael Oh? Jim jim Jim. Lots of e-mails to Amazon, lots of wasted computer space. Alright, let's get back to work. Michael michael Yeah, I assumed Michael was already doing this. That's why I only use my personal e-mail account. Toby toby [moves chair to Jim and Dwight's desks] Ooo, bleh bleh bleh. Michael michael Where's your tie? Dwight dwight I don't know. Just felt like taking it off. Man, work can be just so damn frustrating don't ya think, Jim? Michael michael Uh, yeah, I guess. Jim jim What's going on, Michael. Talk to me. Dwight dwight I don't know, same old stuff. Same old. Boss just been ridin' my ass. Michael michael Oh no! Jan!? What's goin' on? Dwight dwight I don't wanna talk about it. I just wanna hang out, just be one of the guys. Michael michael The most important one of the guys. Dwight dwight That's not the point. Michael michael That's exactly the point. You've hit a slump. It happens to the best of us. You just have to remember, you know- Dwight dwight Yeah. Michael michael Where you come from, and who you are. Dwight dwight Ok. Michael michael You know, you have worked so hard for this. You are the boss; you can buy and sell us with just a snap of your little finger. Dwight dwight Ok yes, I would never do that. Michael michael Yeah, no one can snap with their little finger. Jim jim Ha. Michael michael Jim, this is hardly the time. Dwight dwight No, this is completely the time, this is perfect time. This is just guys gently ribbing each other, it's what it's all about, just hangin' out. Enjoying friends, all being the same. Worker bees. Michael michael And their king bee. Dwight dwight No, just bees, just bees hanging out, buzzing around. Michael michael Master bee. Dwight dwight I'm not a master bee. Michael michael Queen bee. Dwight dwight I'm just a bee, Dwight, ok, just a bee, just buzzin'. Michael michael Hi! Pam pam Hey babe. Hey, how are you!? Roy roy Good. Pam pam You look good. Roy roy Thank you. Pam pam Hey, um, I was wondering if it'd be ok if I go to Lonny's poker game tonight. I promise, it'll be like the last time for a while. Roy roy We were supposed to go to the barbeque at Jim's house. Pam pam Oh, man. Um, could you go without me? Make something up, say I like, ate something, or... Roy roy Uhh... Pam pam Huh, huh? You're the best. You're the best! Roy roy I might be late. Pam pam Ok, don't wake me up cause I'm playing ball in the morning. Roy roy Ok. Pam pam Alright, bye. [Pam looks around the office] Roy roy [to the cameraman] Did I miss anything? Pam pam Five o'clock. Time to go get my improv on. [drinks] Little bit of the comedy juice. Mmm. Alright, see if you can guess what this is. [roars and flails his arms] That is a dinosaur getting ready to go to improv class. Just a taste of the improv. Michael michael I need to know... who shot Johnson! Michael michael Uh, President Johnson. Um- Mary-Beth mary-beth Shut up! Michael michael Ok. Mary-Beth mary-beth I have a right mind to shoot you right in the head. Michael michael I, I killed him. You're right! It was me! Mary-Beth mary-beth Just shut up! I don't wanna hear anything more from you. Michael michael No, listen to what she's saying. Improv Teacher improv-teacher Alright, I'll be quiet if we can make some kind of deal. A deal? Mary-Beth mary-beth Pow! Pow! Pow! Pow! No deal. Not with Michael Scarn, FBI. Michael Scarn doesn't make deals. Michael Scarn shoots and then asks questions later. [blows on his fake gun] Michael michael Good, good. Improv Teacher improv-teacher She was kind of tripping me up, cause she was, um, I was trying to get something going, when I was over her with the gun, and she like kept changing the story. Michael michael I don't think... he was saying- Mary-Beth mary-beth Well, you kept- Michael michael He kept saying "shut up"- Mary-Beth mary-beth Going into nuclear something; that's not where the scene was going. Michael michael I- Mary-Beth mary-beth It goes wherever. Bill bill Well, it goes, it goes in the best direction, and that was not the best direction. Michael michael I felt like he was ordering me around, cause he- Mary-Beth mary-beth Well, he, Michael Scarn, that character, orders people around, and that's, you should of just gone- Michael michael All your characters order people around though, and- Improv Teacher improv-teacher Well... Michael michael There's stronger choices. Improv Teacher improv-teacher I don't think there's any stronger choice than being a really strong character. Michael michael We've seen you do that character before though. I mean, you know, that's cool. Mary-Beth mary-beth Well, it's, like, well, it's, you know, when refine it, refine a character down to its essence, that's... Michael michael Like Jim Carrey or something. Mary-Beth mary-beth Exactly, thank you. Michael michael Right, well I wasn't saying that- Mary-Beth mary-beth I appreciate that. Michael michael Nah, I know, I just meant that... he shot me, I just- Mary-Beth mary-beth Or Ryan Stiles, something like that. Michael michael Yeah, ya know maybe, he made me get on the ground, and I didn't feel safe in this game. Mary-Beth mary-beth You shouldn't have been, 'cause you were dealing with Michael Scarn. That was exactly what I was hoping to achieve, so that is probably the best thing you could have said, that's a compliment. Michael michael You succeeded. Improv Teacher improv-teacher Good work. Michael michael Yeah. Mary-Beth mary-beth And in this room here, if you look closely, you will find out a few clues about who lives here. Um, he likes biking, obviously, and uh, what else? Uh, he likes tour guides, I guess. And if you're very perceptive, you'll notice that he didn't do a great job of cleaning his room [kicks water bottle under bed]. Ok, and uh, that's the tou- Jim jim And he's really into penguins or something? Ryan ryan Um, thank you, Ryan, uh, I don't know, I think I made the mistake one day of telling someone that I like penguins, and here we are. Jim jim Oh, I'm sorry. I gave you a penguin. Phyllis phyllis And that's why it's on my desk, Phyllis; it means a lot to me, and now that I know it was from you, it means even more. Moving on! Uh, ok, so that's the end of the tour for now, and if you liked it please tell your friends: Jim jim Ok, for the next exercise, let's everyone pair up.[everyone picks a partner] And everyone got somebody? Ok, good. [Michael is partner-less] Uh, ok, uh, why don't you go out in the hallway and go through all the rules in your head. Ok, you take a break and sort of run through the rules in your head. Ok, stay there. Improv Teacher improv-teacher I'll just throw out some suggestions. Michael michael Ok, you guys wanna start? [to Michael] Don't throw out any- Improv Teacher improv-teacher They're in a whorehouse. Michael michael Suggestions. Improv Teacher improv-teacher And he's a proctologist. [to teacher] What? Michael michael We don't need a suggestion for this one; it's gonna come from them. [to other students] It's a game called "Yes, and?" and uh, you will say the first sentence. And uh, you're telling a story- Improv Teacher improv-teacher First sentence is: Michael michael Why don't you turn it up? [Ryan moves to turn up the grill] Uh! Not so fast... Fire Guy. Think we need some more heat, Fire Guy? Hey, Fire Guy, maybe we should burn Jim's house down. Kevin kevin That's really funny. Ryan ryan Hey, Kelly; I called him Fire Guy. Kevin kevin Good one, Kev. Kelly kelly Yeah... hey Stanley- Kevin kevin He called me Fire Guy. Ryan ryan Oh, good one. [laughs] Stanley stanley It never gets old. Kevin kevin Never gets old. Ryan ryan